LIMERICKS AND STUFF By Leigh Collin Brandt
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Showing posts with label
smells
.
Show all posts
Showing posts with label
smells
.
Show all posts
Sunday, October 6, 2024
MY PARTY, THE ENEMY AND I FLEE
In a small cave I threw a nice party,
Then shows up, my worst enemy, Marty,
Marty drinks our mixed juice,
Then mean Marty lets loose,
Driving us from the cave with his farty.
Saturday, March 23, 2024
PINE NEEDLE CHEW FOR SPOONING
I put four acorns in my green, mint tea,
That makes a bitter flavor taste for me,
I chew needles of pine,
So my breath smells fresh, fine,
Now my honey will go spooning with me.
Tuesday, March 5, 2024
SOMEONE STINKS
At work Steve always wore a mask,
Even to do a simple task,
His workmate, Punk,
Smelled worse than skunk,
In wretched aromas, Punk did bask.
Thursday, November 9, 2023
I DON'T LIKE BEING GREASY LIKE GRACE
The butter spray exploded into my face,
Now I'm all greasy, like my kid sister, Grace,
She greased her hair,
And, eats like a bear,
I wish she would move out, and get her own place.
Sunday, September 24, 2023
WITCH SPELLING FUN, AND ZITS
Donny liked to eat a pan of bacon grease, fried grits,
But, every time he ate them, Donny broke out with big zits,
So, Donny got a witch to cast a spell,
It cleared his blemishes, very well,
But, Donny got a side affect, tuna fish smelling arm pits.
Thursday, June 29, 2023
JIMMY SMILED SO SLY, ON THE 4TH OF JULY
Jimmy had cracker explosions for the 4th Of July,
He ate olive bologna with sauerkraut on rye,
So with each sky boom, boom,
Jimmy let off a toxic perfume,
Then at the folks all around, he smiled, so sly.
Wednesday, May 3, 2023
IT STINKS, BECAUSE THE DUCKS SCREWED AROUND
Two ducks travel with me in my Ford Motor car,
On long trips they pee in an old mason jar,
But one was wise-craken,
The other laugh-quacken,
The spill smells like the urinal at the bar.
Wednesday, April 5, 2023
MONKEY CY, CRY
There once was a little monkey named Cy,
When he smelled a banana, he'd cry,
It reminded him of mommy,
She was accused being commie,
Then whisked off to prison without a "bye".
Sunday, July 3, 2022
THE BENCH PAINTS MY TRENCH
Pardon my stench,
But I sat on a bench,
Unlike my home stoop,
It was covered in poop,
The poop stuck to the back of my trench.
Saturday, May 21, 2022
A LIMERICK ABOUT NOEL
Noel's breath smelled like his sweaty toes,
And that was the very least of his woes,
His spaceships would never fly,
His car batteries would mostly die,
And no one made him noodles shaped like bows.
Wednesday, April 6, 2022
BLINK
I had a rat living under my sink,
He ate bleach, he died, now he stink,
So I sprayed some air spray,
And the stink went away,
But the spray burned my eyes, blink, blink, blink.😣
Friday, February 4, 2022
JIM, THE CUTTER OF CHEESE
Jim cut the cheese before every meal,
To most of the family, Jim's cheese had no appeal,
But he always made more,
Had an abundant store,
He'd share cheese at work, like he was a wheel.
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