LIMERICKS AND STUFF By Leigh Collin Brandt
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Showing posts with label
employment
.
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Showing posts with label
employment
.
Show all posts
Monday, December 2, 2024
COB-CORN AND THE HAPPY DUDE
Uncle Lee scraped up all the gum, that people had chewed,
People left gum all over, and in places, so rude,
But, it gave Lee a paying job,
Then he could buy corn on the cob,
When Lee ate buttered cob-corn, he was one happy dude.
Wednesday, November 27, 2024
THE PAISLEY SUIT
To work, I wore my brand new paisley suit,
That very day, my boss gave me the boot,
He said never come back,
It was a permanent sack,
"Get your ugly suit out of here, now, scoot."
Monday, September 2, 2024
I LOST MY JOB IN AEROSPACE
My boss kicked me hard, down the unemployment path,
Because my employer required I do math,
But not too long out the door,
I got work moping a floor,
On weekends at the zoo, I scrub down the giraffe.
Wednesday, March 27, 2024
MARCO GOT BANNED
Marko is very bitter,
Since he's been banned from Twitter,
A down toilet seat omiter,
His hair is all green glitter,
He is a doggy sitter.
32724
Monday, March 25, 2024
CLAUDIUS THE CLOWN IS SAD
Claudius the clown, was a very, very stupid man,
He could not learn to tie his shoes, nor open a Spam can,
It was said, Claudius the clown,
Couldn't tell a smile from a frown,
He got fired by the circus, and got a lifetime ban.
Tuesday, March 5, 2024
SOMEONE STINKS
At work Steve always wore a mask,
Even to do a simple task,
His workmate, Punk,
Smelled worse than skunk,
In wretched aromas, Punk did bask.
Monday, February 19, 2024
MONDAY, I'M OFF TO WORK
Monday morning I am soar,
I am tired and could sleep some more,
I was a weekend rowdy,
My mind is still cloudy,
I can't remember how to open the door.
42522
Monday, July 31, 2023
SPEEDY
It was often, almost never said,
That anyone worked as slow as our Fred,
He worked so slow,
Didn't start or go,
But he'd smile, when he drank and got fed.
Friday, July 21, 2023
GERBIL JONES AND DRONES
I have a little pet, named Gerbil Jones,
I let him chew on all the chicken bones,
When he turned five and twenty,
I figured I fed him plenty,
Now he delivers packages, by flying delivery drones.
Saturday, July 8, 2023
JIM'S JOB INTERVIEW IS GOING TO STINK
Jim's French perfume had gone all skunky,
It smelled worse than the pee of his pet monkey,
Jim was due for an appointment,
And had no underarm ointment,
It's a job interview, and Jim's chances are sunky.
Thursday, June 29, 2023
THE COOKIE SQUIRREL AND THE NUMBERS GAL
My sister was always working her trig,
While I ate Newtons made out of fig,
I called her a bright girl,
She called me a squirrel,
She got a great job, while I only got big.
Monday, January 30, 2023
TERMINATION REPORT
They laid me off for the holiday,
Said they might hire me back come next May,
Why I was fired nobody would say,
Of course, I call in sick every Monday,
Monday mornings are cold, so in bed I stay.
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