MICHIGAN BANANAS, YES WE CAN.

Bananas grow bigger in the great, Michigan,

The skins are dark.yellow, and the meat kind of tan,

They thrive in cold or heat,

Raw ones are tough to eat,

After we stew them, we preserve them in a can.

WARNING: DANGEROUS PSYCO IS IN CHARGE OF THE FIREWORKS

What are my high tech skills? I put the fire in the works,

My position, does have several pretty, awesome  perks,

I turn a rocket at a crowd,

The rocket explodes, really loud,

The crowd will scream, and run away, while I laugh at those jerks.

THE SHOE FIXER

My shoes are failing, and falling completely apart,

I wrapped them up with duct tape, but they didn't look too smart,

I hired my cousin, Benny,

He fixes shoes for a penny,

Benny reworked my shoes, but I can't tell them apart.

NO ONE COULD SEE HIS SPEEDO

A hairy bear named Terry, wore his new, sparkling Speedo to the beach,

Nobody saw Terry's Speedo, because bear hair covered the Speedo breach,

Terry cried many tears, so sad,

Terry went home, and told his dad,

Terry's dad said bears can't wear cute human clothes; a lesson, hard to teach.

WORMING THE POTATOES.

Peter is a small seed potato, who lives inside a garden hill,

He lived with parents Bob and Nancy, and a potato worm, named Bill,

Bill chewed holes in Bob and Nancy,

They soon rotted, nothing fancy,

Bill left Peter all alone, because Peter took a pest, poison pill.

FISHING ON LAKE DAN, WITH BIG WORMS

I traveled to the lake to fish, then I went digging in the ground,

I dug down deep, thirteen feet, and big, squirming worms is what I found,

I put them in a can,

Went fishing on Lake Dan,

I caught several fat sunfish, they were mostly, a perfect round.

CATHETER CAT

A hissy, black, kitty cat crossed my tavern path,

It chewed and pulled along someone's leaky, pee cath,12

If a cat crossing my path is bad luck,

And, the cat drags a catheter, oh duck!

I've surely earn some demon God's, rabid wrath.  

THE WINDOWSILL MILLER

There was a dead, bearded miller, on my kitchen windowsill,

I knew he was completely dead, because he laid there, dead still,

Dead bugs, put hunger in my belly,

I slapped a cracker with some  jelly,

To contrast the sweet jelly, I ate a pickle, brined with dill.

LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD AND THE ZOMBIE

I'm Herschel, a two foot tall zombie, and I lurk in the woods,

I only eat the brains of pesky, Little Red Riding Hoods,

Red Hoods are very good to eat,

They tingle the toes on my feet,

Their brains are candy tasty, like vanilla banana puds. 

SUMMERTIME: KNOCKS, ROCKS AND LOCKS

I went to Suite Ste. Marie to play around the locks,

As ships pulled into the locks, I dropped on them small rocks,

The police came for me,

I struggled to be free,

But, they calmed my body down, with head locks and head knocks.

A COLD SPELL IN JULY

I went to the beach for sunbathing, but I started to cry,

We were having a big, beach snowstorm on the Fourth Of July,

I had an expensive sunscreen,

Made with something putrid and green,

With my snow covered raspberry, flip flops, I went home, bye, bye.

<3. 

GREEDY, EVIL BEDBUGS, TOOK OVER MY INNER EARS

A dozen bedbugs, made a race from my feet up into my ears,

Once the bedbugs finished their race, they celebrated with cold beers,

They setup a casino,

And, called it The New Reno,

Then there were big cats and a magic act, which added to my tears.

THIS SPACE WALKER, ALMOST DIED

My spacesuit, suffered a deep, very long tare,

I was saved by my self-patching, underwear,

While walking in space, 

In just such a case,

Safety undies, keeps you pressurized with air.

JERK AND PERKS

I dreamed I was a employed, as a soda jerk,

Way back in the 1950's, when there was such work,

I'd be a one man team,

Who sold real cold ice cream,

What I sloped on the counter, I'd lick up, for my perk.

MATH AND TUNA

I always knew, that the intelligence of my math teacher, was not real,

Teacher waddles all around the class, and barks and smells, like an ocean seal,

Some kids say, "just let him be",

I say, " take him out to sea",

That way he can bark and swim all day, and eat a big tuna for his meal.

TWO LITTLE MINK AND THE BOBCAT

Two little mink ran around the lake, eating dead fish that washed up on the shore,

The little mink ran into a bobcat, then the two little mink were no more,

After chewing mink bones,

The cat napped on beach stones,

After napping, the bobcat looked for food, because his belly begged for some more.