THE MAGIC SUPRISE RAT

Today, I had been feeling sort of low,

So I went to a downtown, magic show,

Out of a top hat,

Was pulled a big rat,

The rat shouted out that his name was Moe.

TURDS, NO WORDS, HOT TEA AND BIRDS

I got out my teacup, and in it were ten black mousey turds,

I needed drink for sup, and the little turds overtook all words,

I bleached out my soiled cup,

Had it lick cleaned by my pup,

Then I made real hot tea, and ate a can of roast chicken birds.

THE LURKING COYOTE AND PAUL

There's a coyote lurking in my barn,

He ate a very skinny rat, oh darn,

The rat was called Paul,

He lived in a stall,

Paul made a nest for his babies, with yarn.

SCRATCHING, AND JIMMY BLEEDS OUT

Jimmy thought the night was going real nice,

Then he got to itching on his head lice,

He scratched and bled,

By morn he was dead,

He was consumed by the cat, rats and mice.

RIP Jimmy RIP😢

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I'M AN UNHAPPY PANSY MAN

I caught a rabbit in my trap,

He started to cry, and I'm a sap,

I let him go,

That so and so,

He ate my pansies, now I'm unhap

BLOOD BITES

The rats they sleep all day, and prowl around all night,

Looking for a spot of food, or an open toe to bite,

Their teeth pierce the fleshy toe,

For them a meal, for you a woe,

Then they disappear again; blood stains mark their flight.

THE LION AND THE EAGLE, AND LITTLE MEALY ME

I was a little chipmunk, and I got chased up a tree,

A big growling cougar cat was really hungry for me,

I climbed to the sky,

But, I could not fly,

An eagle whisked me to the beach, for his lunch by the sea.

A BLANKET FOR THE BARN CAT

My cat lived in the big barn, where it is ice cream cone cold

And now my barn dwelling cat, is getting kitty cat old,

Every night he shook and he shivered,

So I had a cat blanket delivered,

My cat loves his blanket more than rats, mice, or gold.

RATS MADE MY TOILET ACCESSIBLE ANYTIME.

The filth in my house gives my house an A+ rat rating,

That's why I'm left home alone, with my family vacating,

With the rats I'll share,

My food pantry laid bare,

A win, win, for now I'll have the bathroom without waiting.

BLINK

I had a rat living under my sink,

He ate bleach, he died, now he stink,

So I sprayed some air spray,

And the stink went away,

But the spray burned my eyes, blink, blink, blink.😣

LARRY AND THE RAT TRAP

A rodent named Larry sure liked his cheese,
He had no manners and never said please,
He saw a really big chunk,
Just started eating, “Kerplunk!”
The rat trap got old Larry with ease.