POOR PLANNING ON MY NEW YEAR'S EVE

I had poor planning on my New Year's Eve,

Thin ice lost me my sled on Little Lake Steve,

And, deep the motor went humming,

Be there till second coming,

Perhaps insurance will grant me reprieve.

MERMAID IN A CAN OR PSYCHOLOGY 101

I like tuna fish but, the family will not touch,

I say it's the perfect fish but, they say the fish taste is too much,

So, tuna fish at my house is under a family ban,

But, we all chow down on what I've renamed "Mermaid In A Can." 

GEORGE WAITED TO SEE THE NEW YEAR

George waited to see the New Year,
He drank fifty cans of light beer,
To the bathroom he went,
He stayed in there 'till Lent,
So he misssed all the fun and the cheer.