THE DINER SERVED ME AN UNIDENTIFIED OBJECT

At the diner I ordered a turkey wing,

But, instead I got this UO thing,

It had beady eyes,

Was nibbling on my fries,

He said he was an alien on earth slumming.  

 

 *UO=Unidentified Object

THE PORTION WAS SO SMALL

I went to a restaurant and ordered fish for my suppy,

I paid $45.00. and they served me a guppy,

The fish portion was so small,

I gave the waiter a call,

He then, offered me an extra hush puppy.

SMARTER THAN THE AVERAGE BEAR

Donny thought he was smarter than the average bear,

He broke into cabins and did not care,

Then, he found a loaded gun

Played with it just for fun,

Now, Donny is no longer here nor there.

THIS PIRATE NEEDS A TOILET

I am a jolly pirate but, I've never put to sea,🌬⛵⚓💀

I like life onboard a pirate ship but, there is no place to pee,🚻🚽💩

So, I stay on the shore,🌉

Wave bye bye to the pirate corp,🗡🔪

I hope one day there'll be toilets then, it's a pirates life for me.🏝🗺🍍🐳🦀

DONNY LIKED TO DO THE TREASON

Donny liked to do the treason,

To stay in power was his reason,

He used his foul moods,

To excite stupid dudes,

Who think pale skin is in season.

GREEN PICKLE SLUSHIE

I found some pickles lying out in the snow,

They were dark colored and frozen so, I took them to go,

When the pickles thawed, they were mushy,

So, I made pickle slushie,

Boy, having my stomach pumped cost me some doe.

Pardon My Finch

I have a little finch that really roars,

It's flatulent wind blows open oak doors,

And, my finch does not care,

That it pollutes everyone's air,

The smell gives me nose bleeding sores.