JOY RIDDING A REINDEER TO TEXAS

I rode on a magic reindeer in the velvet sky,

I stole the deer from Santa, at the North Pole Fish Fry,

I rode the reindeer all night,

Until I saw the bright light,

Then we touched down in Texas, where the rattlesnakes lie.

THE PAN HANDLER

The guy was away handling pots and pans,

He was the cook on a ship named, The Hans,

When the ship sunk down,

That cook guy did drown,

Trying to save a case of tuna cans.

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THE GEEK WHO WENT TO CREEK

In the Michigan city, called Battle Creek,

I went to a thrift store and bought an antique,

A cute porcelain bear,

With ginger colored hair,

When I took it home, my kids called me a geek.

RED CLAY TEETH

Jimmy got locked into flossing, and flossed his front teeth every day,

Jimmy thought flossing was iconic, but he lost his teeth anyway,

When Jimmy got the bad teeth news,

He walked back home in his deck shoes,

Then Jimmy quit his bad news dentist, and made some new teeth from red clay.

RASPBERRIES IN HEAVEN

My overgrown, deep reddish, raspberry vine,

Dug its sticky prickers, deep into my spine,

They stuck me so deep,

They bled me to sleep,

I now pick berries with the angels, divine. 

DESTINATION SEATTLE

Yesterday, I rode upon the air in a big, old airplane,

A Seattle destination, was my one goal, to obtain,

The dang, old plane hit some torque,

We diverted to New York,

I felt anger and confusion, and it exploded my brain.

SCREAM PARK

In the small town of Mancelona, there was a dream,

To build a family fun park with an outdoor theme,

The theme chosen was bears,

But it gave all the kids, scares,

Instead of a fun park, it was the park of the scream.

TIGER, TIGER, FATTY MEAT

I dream all day long of pickled pigs feet,

It's the only food for super I'll eat,

I chew on the thick pig fat,

Thinking I'm one tiger cat,

Gnawing from the bones the fat and the meat.

PODCASTING DULL

Alden did a Tuesday podcast on making a nice, lemon tea,

He thought he would get a million watchers, but all he got was me,

I had to scoff,

I turned it off,

In comments, I said to make better tea, add honey from a bee.

DAY OF THE FARM

After the farm hay, I put away,🚜🌄

An October rainbow made my day,🌈

I picked my pumpkin patch,🎃

It was a record batch,💲

Some bugs ate my beans, I'll make them pay.🐛🐜😡