CANNED CHICKEN NOODLE SOUP WITH NO CHICKEN IN IT MAKE PEOPLE SICK?

There are many noodles in my chicken noodle soup,

But, I see not a piece of chicken in any soup scoop,

Yet, I hear soup gurgles in soup filled bellies,

Fellow soup eaters have tainted soup belly yellies,

I fear a cumming bathroom blitz with this troop.   

   

ODE TO MY WOODEN SHOES

When I'm hungry I can always chew,

On my left or right wooden shoe,

When things get really tense,

I have a club for defense,

My shoes get attention from more than a few.

GRANDPA PONG BONG

I went to the Care Home to bring Grandad his bong,👴

He insisted I stay and play a few games of Pong,📺

Gramps was a champ at that game,🏆

Got a trophy, methinks "lame,"🙄

You'd think he'd move on to Space Invaders or Kong.👽🐵

SPACE LASER 2021

QANON built a laser in space, 

They built it at a record pace,

They're space laser wasn't first,

But, it was the worst,

It's recoil smacked the moon in the face.

THE ICE SHANTY

An ice shanty sat out on the lake,
Where fishermen fish for perch and splake,
The winter winds stopped,
The ice shanty dropped,
Now it's a home for the fish to take.

WHAT BECAME OF MY SAUSAGE LINKS

I made bean and pepper pork sausage links,

But, my brother-in-laws were both nasty finks,

They ate ten sausages apiece,

Then passed gas like two geese,

And, said that my sausage just stinks.

 

JIMMY LIKED TO EAT HIS PASTRY

Jimmy liked to eat his pastry,
Once he ate it way too hasty,
He got a belly ache,
And gaseous outtake,
The burps were not all that tasty.

MY CAR IS RUSTY OR PIXIE-DUSTY

My car is sprinkled all with rust,
But, the kids all call it pixie-dust,
Well, the engine is magic,
If magic is tragic,
And, getting somewhere not a must.