MY DAD AND HIS COON HOUND

My dad had a coon hound,
It was a vicious dog of prey,
It was a creature that was unbound,
It hunted night and day,

My dad was a terrible shot,
He never could shoot straight,
It is good for my starving family’s lot,
The coon hound got its rate,

The coon hound found the duck and quail,
The coon hound spied the deer,
The coon hound found the rabbit without fail,
And when the DNR was near.

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POOR RIPPY AND HIS SNORT

Rippy liked to take a snort,
Of his homemade wine,
He drank it when he woke-up,
And, every time he’d dine,

One day he ran out of homemade brew,
He felt panic from mind to sash,
He had no tension deliberator,
He could not buy any without some cash,

Poor Rippy had a mental breakdown,
It seems his mind was made of mash,
In a soft cell Rippy sits in a gown,
Against the walls his head he doth bash.

GASOLINE PRICES

Because gasoline prices are going way up,
I have no money on which to sup,
I'll sell my blood,
Borrow from my best bud,
Still, I can't buy  coffee for my cup. 

MARNIE PUT OUT FOR INSPECTION

Marnie put out for close inspection,
Her entire mint stamp collection,
It was a high value estate,
That she would share with a mate,
I decided to give Marnie my full affection.

ANDY GOT THRILLS FROM KOSHER DILLS-Limerick

Andy ate only kosher dills,
Only kosher dills gave Andy thrills,
He once ate a sweet pickle,
That put Andy in a fickle,
He broke out with hives and had chills,