SPARKY THE DOG

Sparky is my sweetie dog,

In my shoes he leaves his log,

I told Sparky he was  bad,

His eyes got really big, sad,

That's the end of this dog blog.

MELON, MEAT AND CORN

I had a watermelon, and I cut the melon into three,

One piece for my dog Lindsey, and the other two pieces, for me,

Then I ate a spiral ham,

My dog Lindsey, just got spam,

Then I shared my last can of corn, and Lindsey was tail-wag happy.

DEAD WITH POODLE NED

My universe collapsed down on my head,

It was my dog coup; I knew I was dead,

I was in doggy heaven,

With my bestie hound, Kevin,

And my enemy, a Poodle, named Ned.

I EAT PETS AND OTHER YUMMY THINGS

I'm eating the beagles, I'm eating the frogs, 

I'm eating the things that crawl under logs,

I ate the goldfish,

The kids named it Trish,

I even ate snakes where everyone jogs.

MY CANARY IN THE COAL MINE

I took my canary into the coal mine, but he did not do too well,

My canary started teetering on one foot, then off his perch he fell,

A bad poisonous gas,

Through his bird lungs did pass,

Too bad my birdie died that day, for I had bought him a new seed shaped bell.

BAD DOG

My swollen eyeballs popped out of my head,

They were ate by my hound doggy, named Fred,

Fred's mouth gave out a loud burp,

His backside whimpered a chirp,

Such a bad day, so I went back to bed.

PAPPY THE PIG AND PINKER TOO

Everywhere that pappy pig went, Pinker was surely to go,

Pinker had the bad flatulence, and he let everybody know,

Embarrassing pappy,

Made Pinker real happy,

When they got home, pappy gave Pinker lectures, and Pinker felt woe.🐖

PAPPY THE PIG AND PINKER

I have a nice pink colored pet pig, named Pinker,

He fishes with a cane pole, bobber and sinker,

Just like his dear, old pappy,

Pinker likes to catch crappie, 

Like pappy, Pinker is a soda pop drinker.

WILL SLEEP WHEN ONE IS DEAD

My little puppy stayed up all night with his best frog, friend Fred,

I told them to sleep; puppy said that he'd sleep when he was dead,

Next day, puppy was very tired,

I gave him sugar; he got wired,

Puppy ran around in circles, and fell sleepy, into bed.

LOVE AND NO TOILET

Because there was a pretty girl he wanted to woo,

Donny moved abruptly to a town called Kalamazoo,

He forgot his goldfish,

His tan cat he called Trish,

And the new apartment he rented had no place to poo. 

MY KITTY CAT IS BRAT?

I went way downtown, and got me a pretty kitty cat,

Kitty cats are very popular, some would say they're brat,

At the kitty store,

I bought my cat, Thor,

Thor was so happy, because I bought him a kitty hat.

PET REINCARNATION: A BEAUTIFUL THING

My poor little pet mosquito, named Ron,

He got squished flat, and became living, non,

His new mosquito ghost,

Found another live host,

In the body of a cockroach, named Don. 

I THINK WE CELEBRATED WITH SAM

I use to have a pony, and his name was Sam,

One day Sam disappeared; the day ma fixed a ham,

It was one glorious beast,

The ham was our Christmas feast,

We all got bloated guts, especially, aunt Pam.

TULIPS FOR ALGERNON.

I had a big tin purple elephant, I named Algernon,

I gave Alger early spring, pink tulips, that he fell upon,

He crushed all the pretty flowers,

Broke them off from their green towers,

I tossed big Al, got a plastic fish, I called him Mastodon.

GERTY, THE DIRTY LITTLE DOG

My Gerty, the dirty little dog,

Jumped on my Android, and tried to vlog,

She's still my best buddy,

But, her paws were muddy,

My Android screen is covered with fog.

GERTY GETS DIRTY AND DIGS HER HOLES

My dog Gerty likes to dig a big hole,

Hunting for the vicious, underground mole,

She plays at catch and release,

Leaves the dirt diggers in peace,

Gerty gets dirty, but has a good soul.

GERTY GOT DIRTY, ONE SUMMER DAY

I went white water rafting, one sunny day,

The river was yucky with swirling red clay,

My little dog, named Gerty,

Got her face all dirty,

I washed her face off, once we got to the bay.

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FRED THE RED HAS GONE TO THE BAY

I had to box and bury my bestest friend, Fred,

My favorite goldfish, only he was more red,

He's now swimming today,

In a heavenly bay,

With all my other goldfish that I have found dead.

HOLLAND AND THE SWEATER COLORED KITTY

I went to Holland because in magazines it looks pretty,

Not the one overseas but, the one southwest of Bay City,

The tulips were the star,

I drank malt liqueur from a jar,

And, bought a sweater with colors matching my kitty.

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THE WILL OF THE MOUSE

The mouse was stuck on the old glue trap,

He squeaked and squeaked and said, "Drat, Drat,"

But, his will kept him yanking,

And, his little feet cranking,

He freed himself, but was ate by the cat.

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