LIFE? UNDERGROUND

My spider buddy and me were real tight,

Spider still gave me a painful big bite,

The next thing that I knew,

I was lifeless and blue,

Then I was buried real deep, out of sight.

WHEN I LIE I PROMISE YOU

The only time I will tell a lie,

Is when I make a promise, guy,

For in life's great big scheme,

A truth is so easy to dream,

Not to promise is hard to explain, why.

BROKEN SKI AND CHEEKS

Jim's jet ski crashed on a rock, by the shore,

His jet ski, he can ride it, never more,

It's messy, it's bad,

Terminated, sad,

Jim's lower checks are injured, very sore. 

6624

SOMEONE'S EATING MY SWEET CUPS

I got raided by porch pirates today,

They grabbed my sealed boxes, and sped away,

They live next door,

On the second floor,

And eat peanut butter cups from eBay. 

CAVITY EMPTOR

Mickey's nice teeth had all cavitised,

The dentist pulled them all, no surprise,

Now Mickey chews with his gums,

Has gas in his tummy tums,

And all dentist, he doth despise. 

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PHIL AND THE INFESTATION

Phil had bugs in his clothes, and up his nose,

The bad bugs gave Phil the itchiness woes,

Phil ripped his clothes clean off,

Blew his nose, then a cough,

Phil built a fire, and burned up his foes.

THE SWEETCORN-FISHY

Kenny had a really big fish,

Benny had a can of sweetcorn,

They made a sweetcorn-fishy dish,

But chowed upon pudding til morn.