LIMERICKS AND STUFF By Leigh Collin Brandt
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Showing posts with label
dirty
.
Show all posts
Showing posts with label
dirty
.
Show all posts
Saturday, March 30, 2024
I WAS A CESSPOOL DIVER; NOT AN OLYMPIC SPORT
I went diving in a nasty cesspool, desperate to come clean,
It made my face all pucker up, so I used mamas Maybelline,
The cess got in my beautiful hair,
That's why my hair is no longer there,
I'll not enter a cesspool again, except in a submarine.
Sunday, July 3, 2022
THE BENCH PAINTS MY TRENCH
Pardon my stench,
But I sat on a bench,
Unlike my home stoop,
It was covered in poop,
The poop stuck to the back of my trench.
Monday, March 7, 2022
RUG RASH AND BITE
I got a rash and an itch when I fell asleep on my rugs,
It seems my rugs are all filled with big, biting bugs,
They ate all my blood, my sweat, and my tears,
They even consumed the wax in my ears,
They ate up my whole body, so don't bother with hugs.
Tuesday, November 2, 2021
GRIEF FROM THE BEEF
I bought my family a big piece of beef,
Didn't know it would bring them constipation relief,
They used the stocks of toilet paper,
Painted porcelain, made bad vapor,
Clearance slimy beef is not worth the great grief.
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