MOSQUITOS BE WARNED

Because my house had loads of mice and rats,

I decided to get myself some cats,

They ate the mice today,

Frightened the rats away,

To deal with mosquitos, I'm getting bats.

WHY I HIT MYSELF SO HARD, MY BRAIN AIN'T RIGHT.

In the latest, late of dark night,

From an earwig, I got a bite,

The evil dear,

Was in my ear,

I slapped my ear, with all my might.

LIFE? UNDERGROUND

My spider buddy and me were real tight,

Spider still gave me a painful big bite,

The next thing that I knew,

I was lifeless and blue,

Then I was buried real deep, out of sight.

BANDALEITO

There was a little mosquito,

They all called him, Bandaleito,

He played a little harp,

In the key of C-sharp,

Bug spray would make him retreato.

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FLIES IN THE OINTMENTS

There were flies in dad's ointments, and bees on the wing,

Then there were hornets with a much nastier sting,

One stung poor little Ben,

And dad asleep in the den,

Even grandma was stung while crocheting something.

LIKE A GOOD NEIGHBOR

My neighbor weaponized my shovel, and attacked some small ants,

The ants were little red biters, and ran up my neighbor's pants,

Like a bloody, daft fool,

He jumped into my pool,

After my neighbor's rescue, I lectured him on cans and can'ts.  

FARE THEE WELL YOUNG JIMMY YONG

Young Jimmy got bit by a bad tick,

And, the tic bite made Jimmy so sick,

It was one hot summer day,

We laid in sand by the bay,

Just a bite, and my Jimmy went quick.

SKEETERS

I've never seen so many big skeeters,

Some of them are as long as eight meters,

Why they grow so darn big,

No scientist can fig,

We must stop them, for the human race teeters.

SKEDGEMOG LAKE RATTLESNAKE NEWS

I jumped into my boat and was bit by a giant rattlesnake,

I did not know how it got there, but I was at ole Skedgemog Lake,

I tried running up the shore, 

Made it to about yard four,

Then I realized I'd soon be honored, with a good old Irish wake.

BEN WALKED IN THE WOODS

Ben walked in the woods, overheated and froze,

He had ticks on his skin, and bugs up his nose,

He was very itchy,

Smelled of pine pitchy,

When he got home, he took a bath in his cloths.

FOUND THE NEXT DAY

Scabies covered nearly all of my skin,

They're itchiness gave me a grimacing grin,

The next day I was found,

I bled out on the ground,

The police said to my next of kin.

BUG BITES AND THE DISAPPEARED

The bugs in the basement are on the crawl,

Soon to be upstairs in the little potty stall,

Then they sneak into the bed,

Bitting from toes to the head,

Biting and biting, until there's no body left at all.

PIG MITES

There were little mites that lived on my pig,

They were irritating, so in mud my pig would dig,

But to even the score,

The mites would bite more,

Now some mites colonized my best wig.

TICK SICK

Lots of people are getting the sicks,

Because they're being bitten by little ticks,

Of course gasoline, 

Got me really clean, 

But I should of stayed away from lit candle wicks.🚬

THE CREEPS THAT MAKE ME BAWL

Winter bed bugs are creeping, crawling,

And, their itches are all enthralling, 

Then, there are the tiny mites,

Who, make you covered with their bites,

But, it's the head lice that cause my bawling.

IT CAME TO THE FAIR

I was manning a fair booth way, way late at night,

I was all alone, there were no peoples in sight,

BAM!!! a great lightning strike,

And, the lights take a hike,

Then, in steps a werewolf and, he knew what to bite.

MY DOG HATES SWISS CHARD OR, IS IT JUST ME

I had a pet doggy named Fred,

He became vicious when he wasn't fed,

But, when I fed him Swiss chard,

He bit me real hard,

So hard I bled out and went dead.

BITERS MAKE ME HIDE

Upon my pond glide scary riders,

Many call them water spiders,

So, in my pond I won't sit,

Too afraid to be bit,

Instead, I'll go back up the beach with the hiders.