LIMERICKS AND STUFF By Leigh Collin Brandt
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Showing posts with label
MUSIC
.
Show all posts
Showing posts with label
MUSIC
.
Show all posts
Wednesday, December 11, 2024
THE LITTLE PIC WAS SENT HOME
The piccolo player only played with one hand,
He would make awful sounds, when he played in our band,
He had the tears of the sad,
When we all got really mad,
But, we all were happy, once pic player was canned.
Saturday, November 23, 2024
RANDY THE TUBALEER
Terry is a tubaleer, his tuba sound is Jim dandy,
When Terry plays his tuba, many sing and dance, like Randy,
Randy stomps his two fat feet,
Rocking to the tuba beat,
Terry the great tubaleer, makes music that is ear candy.
Friday, November 22, 2024
TUBA TERRY IN TUCKER TOWN
Terry played the tuba in parades in Tucker Town,
Every holiday, he'd parade uptown to down,
Back aches made Terry moan,
So, he switched to Sousaphone,
Now, Terry marches pain free, from Main Street down to Brown.
Tuesday, November 12, 2024
THE CHOIR WITH THE BIG BANG
Benny sang soloist in a choir gang,
Benny ate too many beans, before he sang,
As Benny's britches rang and rang,
The choir master said, "Oh, dang",
Benny's solo ended, with a great big "Bang!".
Thursday, September 12, 2024
UNHINGED TRUMPETER
Tory the 1st chair trumpeter, became quite unhinged,
Because on Johann S. Bach, all night she super binged,
Her lips were sore,
Her tongue was tore,
She started Toccata and Fugue, and her fingers cringed.
Monday, September 9, 2024
CRUSHED DREAMS OF THE CELLIST
My cello was run over by a sports car,
It's destroyed, now I won't be a cellist star,
I thought it wouldn't get injured,
So it was never insured,
I went from concerts, to tending a dive bar.
Thursday, September 5, 2024
THE ENSEMBLE: STRINGS, SPOON AND BASSOON
My orchestral instrument is the tin spoon,
The guy sitting next chair, blows a wood bassoon,
When spoon hits bassoon wood,
The sound is mostly good,
Supported by strings, we make a pretty tune.
Monday, July 15, 2024
THE HIGH NOTES OF AMADEUS
I cannot sing one single, real high note,
That Amadeus Mozart ever wrote,
My voice is just too horse,
High notes hurt, of course,
So, I play cello, on those notes I float.
Friday, June 28, 2024
WHEN MY FLUTE BREAKS, I BUY A BETTER ONE
My glass Pan flute fell onto the floor,
It shattered, and would toot never more,
I stepped above my class,
Bought a flute, made from brass,
I now toot until my lips are soar.
Wednesday, June 12, 2024
SAMMY PLAYS AND LIVES THE BLUES
I once knew a heaping pig, and his name was Sammy Tews,
He played electric guitar, but only rhythm and blues,
Sammy played real well,
All the neighbors, done tell,
But he violated copywrite, now he gets sues.
Saturday, June 1, 2024
NICE SPOONING, PHIL
Phillip Sparkle played some old giddy, show tunes,
On his brand new set of silver plated spoons,
He played most of the day,
Till sunshine went away,
Then Phil ate a plate full of sweet macaroons.
Thursday, May 9, 2024
BILLY GOT ITCHY
Bill penned out a song that was extraordinary, real nice,
He made the melody on his harmonica, device,
The record was a go,
And, Bill loved the cash flow,
But, he got served for divorce, because he brought home leg lice.
Saturday, May 4, 2024
MY TRUMPETER'S LULLABY SAID, "NIGHT, NIGHT", LONG AGO
I stored away my trumpet, for the last thirteen odd years,
I got it out to play, but it just made noise to my ears,
My lips are all soft blubber,
And my tongue, solid rubber,
I did sound much better, after I drank one million beers.
Tuesday, April 23, 2024
IF YOU HURT MY TRUMPET, I WILL HURT YOUR TOOT EVEN MORE
Benny took my pretty trumpet, and dropped it on the floor,
Then, Benny took my trumpet, and nailed it to the backdoor,
Benny gets so very mean,
On every Halloween,
So, I sawed in half his Pan flute, and it will play no more.
Saturday, April 13, 2024
MY NEW MUSIC HOBBY
I bought me some records that they call LP,
They make lots of noise, which makes a happy me,
I heard a trumpet toot, toot,
And, the peep, peep of a flute,
Then someone was singing, but they were off key.
Wednesday, April 10, 2024
NO TOCK, SO I BACH
I went today to see my heart specialist doc,
He said my heart had a tick, but seldom a tock,
It made me both sad and happy,
I would soon see my dead pappy,
Soon dad's fiddle I'll hear playing, Johan S. Bach.
Friday, March 22, 2024
LIP-SPIT MARCH
I heard the Turkish March, as the band played down the road,
I heard the brass lip-spit spraying, as they passed by my abode,
I'm sure Wolfgang was so proud,
The band was really, really loud,
They got tickets with stiff fines, because they broke the nuisance code.
71422
Wednesday, March 20, 2024
BANDALEITO
There was a little mosquito,
They all called him, Bandaleito,
He played a little harp,
In the key of C-sharp,
Bug spray would make him retreato.
32024
Tuesday, March 19, 2024
BALLAD OF THE LITTLE TRUMPETIER
The little trumpetier,
Played best after drinking his beer,
And, for half a shot and a fin,
He'd back-play violin,
It's too bad he had a tin ear.
7221
Thursday, March 7, 2024
THE HARPSICHORD BLUES
When I play music on the harpsichord,
Everyone's closed eyes, look terribly bored,
My notes don't fly,
I try and try,
At competition, I win no award.
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