GERTY GOT DIRTY, ONE SUMMER DAY

I went white water rafting, one sunny day,

The river was yucky with swirling red clay,

My little dog, named Gerty,

Got her face all dirty,

I washed her face off, once we got to the bay.

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I SWAM 3 METERS

I swam 3 meters and sank down 4,

If I hadn't stopped swimming I would have sunk down more,

Of course, I'm a human,

I'm not a fish,

And, swimming makes my human parts feel very sore.

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ADAM WAS A LITTLE, HUNGRY TROLL

Adam was a cute little troll, a cute little troll, like me,

Then our Adam grew to be six feet tall, by the age of three,

At four, Adam played college B-ball,

By then, he was nearly twelve feet tall,

But, Adam was still a troll, and kept eating the referee.

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PATRONS GET STUCK IN A DART SPORTS BAR (Go Figure?)

I received a summons, to go see the great judge, in court,🏛

The great judge said, he had a very, concerning report,🐿

While at the dart club, playing darts,🎯

I hit three patrons, in their hearts,😭

The judge said until I got eye ware, my sport I must abort.😠

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THE ADVENTURE OF RIM TIM TIN

I shopped, and  bought a little metal, fishing boat, and I named it Rim Tim Tin,

It was made of tin can-like aluminium, and the aluminium was thin,

I went out in the boat with my dog,

We ran over a floating pine log

The aluminum buckled, my dog chuckled, and the water came rushing in.

I EYEBALL VOLLEYBALL

I was fishing in a boat on a bay, when a unicorn swam in from the sea,

The unicorn had four legs and a golden saddle, and was beckoning to me,

I hopped upon his sea saddle,

He swam, I didn't have to paddle,

He swam me to a team finals volleyball beach; seems they needed a referee.

A POINTLESS DAY RIVER FISHING

Donny went river fishing in his fibreglass canoe,

It had a couple of small leaks, because it was not new,

Donny didn't get bites that day,

He paddled down to the bay,

He did find a shinny stone, with a sparkle that was blue.

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12 SKUNKIES

 Twelve skunks moved to Midland Michigan, from a town called Montreal,

They all moved to Michigan, because hula hooping was their call,

In Michigan, we hula hoop,

Some folks skipping, both food and poop,

These twelve skunks, will fit in, so we'll let them hula hoop, through our mall.

MARCHING BAND TIME

The hometown band was marching extremely, way crazy fast,

Their scheduled halftime show, would surly, not properly last,

The drum major slowed them all down,

Twirling his baton up and down,

That performance, everyone was glad, was in the past.

THE WART, A COURT AND ABORT

The Tepo Tiger was a gigantic, green wart,

Worn by a novice player, on a tennis court,

It was atop his right hand,

It was a part of the brand,

But, the lazy player, did a career abort.

FISHING ON LAKE DAN, WITH BIG WORMS

I traveled to the lake to fish, then I went digging in the ground,

I dug down deep, thirteen feet, and big, squirming worms is what I found,

I put them in a can,

Went fishing on Lake Dan,

I caught several fat sunfish, they were mostly, a perfect round.

THE LION AND THE BEAR, GAVE THIS FISHERMAN A SCARE

I walked to the other side of the lake, and a lion was there,

He started eyeing me real good, as did his buddy, the big bear,

I took my walk, to catch a big fish,

I cast out my line, and hooked my wish,

I tossed my fish between the two beasts, and ran home, like a scarred hare.

A PIRATE DINGY

Tilly raised his pirate flag, above his dingy, that sat out on the bay,

When Tilly rowed toward a victim, they would lift up anchor, and drift away,

Tilly was not a great pirate skipper,

Never got loot;  some gave him canned kipper,

At night, you can still hear someone rowing, it's Tilly the pirate, some say.

I ONCE WAS DOPE

I rode on my new tricycle, and everyone said, I was dope,

I rode it straight up a steep hill, when all others gave up, and lost hope,

The next side, I went down by design,

It was a drop off, didn't end so fine,

Now, it will take a year to mend bones, and with the pain, it's hard to cope.

TRINA WENT BASS FISHING, WITH A WORM

Trina went trolling out on a flat lake, with a big plastic worm,

She kept her worm lure close to the boat, to watch the plastic worm squirm,

Trina made only one pass,

When her worm was attacked by a bass,

Trina was so surprised, she fell overboard, and ruined her perm.

LOON LAKE PONTOON

I''m going out on the lake, that is famous for their loon,

Gonna try to see one, while cruising on grandpa's, pontoon,

The old motor has some quirks,

Once warmed up, it often works,

We'll start early, and be back for the hotdog roast at noon.

POGO STICKING, GOES VIRAL

I am an alpha player, with the power pogo stick,

I jump higher and further, than all others in my clique,

I can jump twenty feet, high,

Jump the Thames, and barely try,

Now days, joining a pogo club, does not make you a hick.

CASPER'S NAUTICAL ADVENTURES

My short, silver dinghy, went sinking, then sucked down,

All of my favorite fishing bait, it all drown,

Except, Casper, the leach,

Swam off to the beach,

He became a hero, in the old fishing town.

POACHING MY WAY TO JAIL

My dinner was a little fish, its corpse was flaky and tender,

I caught it out of season, so I am a poaching fish, offender,

Last night I ate a rabbit,

I poached it; a bad habit, 

Tuesday my crimes go before a judge, and to jail, he'll be my sender.

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I DULLED MY HOOK ON A SALMON, AND THE CRAPPIE GOT AWAY

I lost another crappie fish, off my hook,

It was a sneaky fish, and my worm he took,

My rusty, old hook, ain't very sharp,

Because I used it, fishing for carp,

When I hooked a salmon, a great big Chinook.