BEETLE AND THE J

I had a pet beetle, but he ran quickly away

He was caught and eaten by an old frazzled blue jay,

At the end of his beak,

The blue jay had a leak,

The guts of my beetle, dripped out of the  jay that day.

SHARKS IN LAKE MICHIGAN

I went out on Lake Michigan and got bit by a shark,

I did not feel any pain, then it suddenly went dark,

I woke up in the sharks belly,

Being made into poop jelly,

Far off in the distance, I heard my pet doggy, bark, bark...

RANDY HAD BRANDY

There once was a sweet rabbit named Randy,

He delivered baskets full of candy,

Randy hopped into a lion,

Randy took off home, just flyin',

That night he had a nightcap of Brandy.

THE FOX AND THE DIRTY DEEDS

My four hens were out pecking at sunflower seeds,

Then along came a fox, and he did four dirty deeds,

I had no eggs the next morn,

Just four kernels of stale corn,

I filled up my belly on coffee and weeds.

LAKE SHARKS

There are sharks in all Michigan lakes,

They attack tourists on vacation breaks,

A shark took off my leg,

So, I carves me a peg,

Now, I hunt them to.get me some steaks.

BLOOD BITES

The rats they sleep all day, and prowl around all night,

Looking for a spot of food, or an open toe to bite,

Their teeth pierce the fleshy toe,

For them a meal, for you a woe,

Then they disappear again; blood stains mark their flight.

BYE, BYE BIRDIE, TIGER GO DOWN

A tiger was climbing way, way up high in a tall tree,

He was after a sparrow, but that bird flew off to sea,

When the giant tiger found,

He was too high off the ground,

He jumped from the high branches, hurt his right paw, but was free.

A BELLY FULL OF COW, AND STUFF

There was an alligator in my cow pond, and he ate every cow,

He ate my cats and rabbit, and he ate the dog that went "bow wow"

I set a trap,

But it was crap,

The gator ate my kids,and cousin, and my neighbor Rev. Dow.

ITCHY RICHEY AND MY KITTY

I  had this fish, his name was Richie,

He complained that he was itchy,

The cat offered a claw,

Gave Ritchie a naw,

Now my Ritchie is really twitchy. 

I STAYED UP WITH FREDDY

I went out to see the super full moon,

I watched it with Freddy, he's a raccoon,

But uncommonly thick,

Was the blood sucking tick,

And you had to dig the critters out with a spoon.