LIMERICKS AND STUFF By Leigh Collin Brandt
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Showing posts with label
CRIMINAL
.
Show all posts
Showing posts with label
CRIMINAL
.
Show all posts
Saturday, March 30, 2024
DADDY SELLS MEDICAL SUPPLIES III (NON ORGAN DONOR MARKET)
Daddy goes out on the street, very late at night,
Looking for used body parts, when supplies are tight,
When old organs fail,
Daddy finds some for sale,
Guaranteed to fit the wealthy client, just right.
Tuesday, February 6, 2024
THEY DIPPED SOME CHIPS IN MY BRAINS
The judge said I was criminally, completely insane,
He ordered AI chips to be stapled into my brain,
I did not feel anything,
Til my ears started to ring,
Then my eyeballs popped out, causing pain.
Thursday, January 18, 2024
TOO LITTLE
Too Little rode on a too little trike,
Until Too Little stole a too little motorbike
Too Little stole the mail,
But what sent Too Little off to jail,
Too Little was caught with two too little pike.
Wednesday, November 8, 2023
IF I TAKE THE BAIT, WHAT THEN MY FATE
Out in the road a $100 bill has laid, waiting for some quick feet,
I'd like to go and grab it, but I'm sure a policeman I will meet,
They are always watching me,
And set traps consistently,
Then for $100 dollars, I'll stay at the county lockup retreat.
Saturday, August 19, 2023
I AM A CRIMINAL INVESTIGATIVE REPORTER
I became a reporter because I like to snoop,
I've always looked for the juiciest scoop,
Like the two bears in the woods,
Who ate Ridding Hoods,
I exposed them with the bones, I found in their poop.
Sunday, March 19, 2023
I'LL BE GROWING POTATOES IN THE NEIGHBOR'S FIELD, COME SPRING
I wanted to try a magnificent pillage,😈
So I went over to the neighboring village,😁
They had swords over there,😧
I lost head and hair,😢
I now wait in a field for spring tillage.💀
Wednesday, May 25, 2022
THE SQUAT TROT
In a tent on an abandoned lot,
I found me a place to squat,
I thought the living would be free,
But it weren't meant to be,
The owners chased me off; made me trot.
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