SQUIRRELS ARE LAME GAMERS

I saw two squirrels playing a very silly game,

Rock, Scissors, Paper, a game that is so, so lame,

Should play Five Card Stud,

That game ain't a dud,

And, if you win all the money, life won't be the same.

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THE SIMPLE WINNER

I won a set of new screwdrivers at the bingo hall,

I was so excited, when I got that last number call,

My porch has a loose board,

Now if a screw, I could afford?

I could stand on the board, and stand there real tall.

SANTA HAS A PROBLEM

Santa has no toys this year, because he had no money to pay,

So he bought some discounted rhubarb, then he loaded up his sleigh,

So every good little boy or girl,

Will get some rhubarb to make them hurl,

Because Santa loves online poker, and he can loose all day.

MOST TIMES, IT'S IN OUR STARS

Ricky drove a pallet jack, unloading dish soap off a truck,

Seven long years of college, and Ricky's life did truly suck,

Owed 90 thou in college debt,

Left his wife, he did regret,

The only chance that Ricky has, is blackjack and lady luck.