LIMERICKS AND STUFF By Leigh Collin Brandt
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Showing posts with label
diarrhea
.
Show all posts
Showing posts with label
diarrhea
.
Show all posts
Thursday, May 9, 2024
ROT GUT VEGETATION AND POO
I pulled a pickle from a pickle jar, and it was hairy,
I put the pickle back and went and picked a strawberry,
Produce that is hairy,
Is awful scary,
And, often hairy, scary makes for a watery poo, poo.
5924
Tuesday, February 6, 2024
LOVE BUNNY SITS ON MY TOILET
My love bunny is so crybaby sad,
My love bunny ate scallops that were bad,
The soft toilet seat,
Is love bunny's retreat,
When I can use the toilet, I'll be glad.
Monday, November 6, 2023
JOHN, RON, DON, AND THE THE PORCELAIN MASTERPIECE
I went to the office and went to the John,
The porcelain was painted, I think it was Ron,
Ron just left a big mess,
Now he's chatting with Bess,
I called up the daytime janitor, poor Don.
Sunday, July 9, 2023
MAROON COULD BE A COLOR, BUT IT IS DEFINITELY NOT A FRIEND
My garden potatoes were colored maroon,
No one would eat them, except Mr. Raccoon,
He ate them on a dare,
Then messed his underwear,
He sat on the toilet from noon until noon.
Saturday, July 16, 2022
IN THE KINGDOM OF THE BERRIES, THE TOILET STOOL IS KING
Berries make most people happy,
They turn fossilized bowels into bowels so sappy,
And, although it's not fair
When TP is rare,
In their bathrooms consumers feel trappy.
Saturday, June 4, 2022
TOO LOOSE TO TREK
Sammy was a too loose goose; too loose to trek,
Sammy started up a hill and then said, "to heck"
Sammy had to way backtrack,
To the outdoor bathroom shack,
By the time he made it there, Sammy was a nervous wreck.
Monday, April 4, 2022
PETER PIG WAS TAINTED, AND PORCELAIN BOWLS GOT PAINTED
Peter Pig was ground into sample sausages, down the street at Vinny's Store,
The customers sampled Peter Pig, until Peter was no more,
The samples caused symptoms like the flu,
Vinny's customers threatened to sue,
Most had underwear accidents, before making it out the door.
Monday, December 20, 2021
THE TALE OF TWO TROTTER ON A POTTER
This be the tale of Mr. and Mrs. Trotter,
They liked eating raw oysters and otter,
They both spent much time on the potter,
They'd flush it away with much water,
Then they both laid down on the cotter,
Tuesday, November 2, 2021
GRIEF FROM THE BEEF
I bought my family a big piece of beef,
Didn't know it would bring them constipation relief,
They used the stocks of toilet paper,
Painted porcelain, made bad vapor,
Clearance slimy beef is not worth the great grief.
Tuesday, June 15, 2021
TAINTING THEN PAINTING: OYSTERS FOR SUPPER
I served some oysters that were tainted,
Result, my toilets my kinfolk painted,
Then, as my home filled with vapors,
I had to go buy toilet papers,
At last, with sights and smells, I done well fainted.
Tuesday, December 1, 2020
DONNY DAZE
Donny loved to gather money,
It was the only way he could find a honey,
For, he had no hair,
Bad underwear,
And, down his leg dripped something runny.
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