PORK RINDS AND DOOMSCROLLING, WILL MAKE KAPPIE HAPPY

Kappie is a not too happy boy, a miserable old boy is he,

He always lifts great weights, eats powdered drinks, but real flimsy, Kappie be,

As lonely Kappie grows older,

Girl's reactions, grow colder,

Now that Kappie's past his prime, he should eat pork rind, and doomscroll his tv. 

LOSING IT AT THE GYM

My buddy ate two pounds of tasty, dried plum,

I told my buddy, he should only eat some,

It was at the local town gym,

My bud lost all foods, within him,

Buddy got banned for spreading poop like a bum.

TURNING BLUBBER INTO RUBBER

I turned into blubber by taking the cabs,

So, I went to the gym to build up my abs,

I turned my soft blubber,

Into a hard rubber,

I changed eating cycles, and other bad habs.

THE MUFFIN GIVES ME STUFFIN', AND THE SACK WILL TREAT MY BACK

I tried a little exercise, and I hurt my back,

I had to lay flat on the floor of my shack,

Finally, I grabbed the doorknob on the door,

And crawled up from the floor,

I ate a corn muffin, and then, I hit the sack.

I WENT TO THE GYM NOW, MY BOD IS SO TRIM

I decided to workout at the gym,

I got covid and the outlook was grim,

I soon died from those germs,

Became food for the worms,

It's what happens when your brain light is dim.

NO SWIM AT THE GYM, STINKY SHOES

There were some stink bugs in my shoes,

Now, my footsies are bad news,

I got banned from the gym,

I thought I'd clean off with a swim

But, the members had alternative views.