PEGGY WAS PARDONED FOR A URINATION VIOLATION

Peggy poodle got a pardon for peeing in the park,

Bulldog Bernie ratted out Peggy with a ruff, ruff bark,

Policeman Paul did respond,

But, of Peggy, he was fond,

Paul blew Peggy a big kiss, but with Bernie, he was snark.

THE NO HOME CODE

As I turned my old pickup down my home-sweet-home road,

Noticed a contractor was tearing down my abode,

I phone called a cop,

Said please make them stop,

He said no, because I violated building code.

BETWEEN BACON AND SOCIAL MEDIA, I CHOSE BACON EVERYTIME

I went to Twitter and I couldn't twit a tweet,

I felt really low, I felt deep defeat,

I did not get bitter,

Because they signed me off Twitter,

I can spend the time frying bacon to eat.