EGGS: BEAKS, LEGS AND EYES

I always drive over to Canada, to buy the best breakfast eggs,

Their nice, big eggs don't have little chickens inside, with beaks, eyes and legs,

While eating tater chips with ridges,

I must drive over two long bridges,

Of course, when I come back from Canada, I'll smuggle in a few beer kegs.

WHAT'S SITTING IN MY WILLOW, WITH A CRUMPET AND A TEA?

There was an Anglo-Saxon, sitting in my willow tree,

He was nibbling on a crumpet, and sipping on some tea,

I asked him if his crumpet tasted good,

He said, "it tastes like wormy, willow wood",

I didn't ask him about his drink; I thought I'd let it be.

DRONES OVER THE TRAILER PARK

My trailer park is being overrun by flying drones,

The flying drones interfere with our functioning cell phones,

Our TVs have gone hush,

Our full toilets, won't flush,

And, drone ray guns burn the flesh off our bones.

MONTREAL VACATION

I went to Montreal to see the buildings and the beautiful sites,

But I had trouble speaking French, because I lack some brights,

At restaurants, I felt despair,

For food and drink, I had just air,

Next time I go to Montreal, with an interpreter I'll get the tights. 

I FOUND MUM ON MOTHER'S DAY

I was an orphan; didn't know from whence I come,

On Mother's Day, I felt very glum,

So I traveled far,

To find a parental star,

I went clear to Egypt to find me a mum.