I WENT TO JAIL FOR MY SELF EXPRESSION

I went to the pub; bellied up to the bar six or seven times,

When there was absolutely no one looking, I would scratch some rhymes,

As my Limericks got sillier,

The bartender got bullier,

And, he had me arrested for destruction of property, crimes.

THE BAD BEHAVIOR OF TINKER

I once knew a vampire, named Tinker,

Tinker was quite a mean, big, bad stinker,

He was not a dear,

He bit me on the ear,

I told Santa; yes, I am a finker.

JIM WENT TRICK-OR-TREATING ON THE 9TH OF MAY

Jim went trick-or-treating, 
On the 9th of May,
He didn't get any candy,
But, he got a 90 day jail stay,

It was not very funny,
When the neighbors called the cops,
Because Jim was dressed like a Playboy Bunny,
And, his breath just wreaked with hops,

The judge didn't care that it was all for candy,
Instead, he just slowly shook his head,
He said Jim was a real "Jim Dandy,"
And, in county lock-up he'd make his bed,

The days each passed like they were years,
And, Jim yearned for candy more and more,
But, the next time he wouldn't trick-or-treat,
Deciding, he'd just take it from a store.