GRANDPA BLOODSUCKER

My granddad was born in 1795,

I do not know how, but granddad is still alive,

He only comes out at night,

Disappears by first daylight,

They say he must drink fresh, human blood to survive.

THE HEADLESS NIGHT TERROR

I saw a ghost in the hall, with a big sharp ax, and he was blood red,

He was dripping blood on my floor, and missing his natural, human head,

I said, "please, Mr. Ghost, go away,

I just cannot take this, today,"

The ghost lifted his ax; a voice filled the room, "I'm taking your head, hooray!"

THE JANUARY WOLF MOON

When the Wolf Moon rises,

There be terror surprises,

The hooting owl,

The wolf howl,

Most dangerous, friendly disguises.

BREATH MINTS MATTER

Jimmy gave Joe some breath mints, and insisted Joe should take them soon,

Because werewolves were attracted to bad breath, and it was a full moon,

But, Joe was cheap,

Thought Jimmy, a creep,

Then Jimmy turned into a werewolf, and Joe and Jimmy began to spoon.

DEMON DAZE AT THE GROCERY STORE

100 hungry demons came storming through my door,

They ate my pets and family, still they wanted more,

I know demons are really bad,

But I couldn't see them looking sad,

So I gave them lots of money and sent them to the grocery store.

DEMON SIT

There were old devils in the pit,

And they were taken a demon sit,

They cast their spells,

On Cosmic elves,

Then once done, they split.

THE DEMON DAZE SPECIAL

It's Demon Daze at the local grocery Store,

If you are a demon, you get deep discounts and more,

You get free coffee and donut holes,

Plastic microwavable bowls,

And every 13th demon wins a prize at the door.

ELFIN 👹

Whimper, whimper in the night,

I'm whimpering because of fright,

There are beastly elves,

Sitting on my shelves,

I'm on their menu, tonight.😱

DEMONS ARE SOMETIMES JUST MISUNDERSTOOD, AND VIOLENT

There was a little demon, who stole all of my dry goods,

I caught him making pancakes, way out yonder near the woods,

I demanded he give my dry goods back,

Instead he burnt down my barn and shack,

Of course demons can be violent, which I misunderstoods.

CURSED

Everyone always tells me that life is easy as a breeze,

But I'm always living with war, petulance, famine and disease,

Maybe I have gloomy rhymes,

But I'm always living in real bad times,

Whatever evil spirit cursed me, I wish I could appease.

THE FUTURIST

I don't think there is any truth hidden deep within a dream,

Nor do I think future signs ride through space on a sunbeam,

I don't believe in ghostly boards,

Nor seeking truth in wind blown chords,

Those who do the selling, divine a fortune from these schemes.