THE PIT AND THE PENDULUM REMASTERED

Johnny was captured, and taken to the pit,

He got cut by a pendulum, that was it,

He got cut in half,

Infected with staff,

Now Johnny has no way that he can sit.

22224

FEEDING THE WEREWOLF

I was out in my garden, sitting in my summer seat,

Waiting for the werewolf, for he was coming for his meat,

I heard a crackling in the wood,

Behind me, the werewolf stood,

I felt his hot breath, his teeth, and he proceeded to eat.

21724

THE JANUARY WOLF MOON

When the Wolf Moon rises,

There be terror surprises,

The hooting owl,

The wolf howl,

Most dangerous, friendly disguises.

HERMES: HEARTS AND SMELLS

Hermes loved the Poe story of "The Tell Tale Heart",

Unfortunately with Hermes, he had a tell tale fart,

And, just wouldn't you know,

The sound of farts would grow,

The sound was ever increasing, bringing Hermes regret and woe.

DUCK AND A STORY

I have this wonderful duck, his name is Stew,

I bought him, and cooked him in a pot for you,

He's nice and tender,

Saved his fat to render,

After lunch we'll finish reading Bunny Blue.

THE OLD LADY, THE KIDS, THE SHOE AND THE WARLOCK

There was a little green warlock, and he owned a small shoe,

He rented it to an old lady with kids, quite a few,

The kids had some great fun,

By the time they were done,

The shoe was destroyed, and the little warlock had to sue.

He'll Never Eat Zombie Again

The zombies came for a meal of my brains,

I killed them with my saw that spins chains,

Zombie parts flew everywhere,

Smell attracted a big bear,

Zombie meat gave the big bear belly pains.

THE PLANT SPIRIT

I just met the ghost of a red daffodil,

It use to live way up on this hill,

But a chipmunk, who was rude,

Thought the daffodil was food,

The daffodils' spirit wanders the hill still.

JINGLE BELL BERT AND THE RED RIDING HOODS

There was a bear waiting in the darkening woods,

He was waiting to steal my dried and caned up goods,

So I got my jingle bell named Bert,

I rang Bert until the bear's ears hurt,

The frightened bear then coughed up, six red riding hoods.

THE TORTOISE AND THE ECLAIR

There once was a tortoise who ate only eclairs,

The tortoise laid 3 eggs and from the 3 eggs came 3 bears,

Then there was the bird,

That nobody heard,

The bird got straight A's in school, but nobody cared.

MY BLOG IS ALL POOPY

I blog about this, I blog about that,

I know I've been blogging too long, when I blog about scat,

Because nobody cares,

About the poop from the bears,

Or the texture of guano from a bug eating bat.