GAMMA GRANDMA AND THE MONKEYS PAW

My monkey's unearthly armpits, smell like bananas,

Not like chunk, diced onions, emanating from nana's,

My monkey's little paw,

Reminds me of grandma,

Her skin is so wrinkled, from sunbathing in gammas.

I WAS A CESSPOOL DIVER; NOT AN OLYMPIC SPORT

I went diving in a nasty cesspool, desperate to come clean,

It made my face all pucker up, so I used mamas Maybelline,

The cess got in my beautiful hair,

That's why my hair is no longer there,

I'll not enter a cesspool again, except in a submarine.

MY SHOWER ROPE WAS EMPTY

Mason used up all the soap,

So, all I had was an empty rope,

So, I used up his shampoo,

Got even, true,

Now, he won't be telling ma, that I'm just a stupid dope.