LIMERICKS AND STUFF By Leigh Collin Brandt
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Showing posts with label
meals
.
Show all posts
Showing posts with label
meals
.
Show all posts
Wednesday, April 3, 2024
OLD JEFFREY IN THE MORNING
Jeff had two turkey sausages along with his tea,
He would of had eggs, but they disagree with Jeffrey,
Jeff did drink orange juice,
To keep his bowels loose,
OJ also gives old Jeffrey his vitamin C.
Monday, March 4, 2024
MY DOG AND TONY SHOW
My dog was looking thin and bony,
So I fed him some macaroni,
I took him to see his dog friend, Tony,
I think their friendship is kind of phony,
They love to watch My Little Pony.
Saturday, February 17, 2024
HAM FLAVORED CLERKY MANAGER
A lion walked into a grocery store, looking for a plump clerk,
The clerks were all very thin and busy, rushing around their
work,
A portly mean manager, named Sam,
Was yelling, and smelled like ham,
The lion hauled Sam out the door, and fed her cubs ham flavored jerk.
21724
Saturday, February 10, 2024
BAD DAY AND BOWS
I tripped over my toes,
That started off my woes,
I hit my head,
I went to bed,
For breakfast, I had macaroni bows.
Wednesday, November 22, 2023
ANOTHER HOLIDAY VISITOR
There was an evil raven in my house; he flew in through my door,
He started a conversation, that I decided, best to ignore,
Then he pecked upon my head,
I hit him hard, and he was dead,
So we ate raven for Thanksgiving, and he tasted like a s'more.
Sunday, November 5, 2023
EPITAPH IN RHYME
I was eating some beans flavored with dill,
Drank a soda to wash down the bad swill,
I didn't know my cola,
Was laced with Ebola,
Then they buried me way far up the hill.
Friday, October 13, 2023
MENU FOR MY DINNER PARTY
There's nothing more nutritious than burnt beans and raw fishes,
Everyone loves it: guests lick clean their own dishes,
Then a desert of ice cream and tripe,
But the tripe must be ripe,
Finally, the fish bones may be broke granting wishes.
Sunday, September 17, 2023
VEGETARIANISM SCHISM.
Some plants grow very high, some plants grow very low,
Some plants have cute fruits, some have fat tubers below,
Some plants make you sick,
And, they'll ghost you real quick,
I'd rather eat burgers, and chop plants with my hoe.
Friday, August 11, 2023
JERRY THE BEAR
I went to see Jerry at his lair,
I owed Jerry money; he was a bear,
It's kinda funny,
Jerry didn't want my money,
He ate my liver and said, "we are square".
Thursday, July 20, 2023
PRAWNS
I love to eat tasty, butter fried prawns,
I eat a big plate when the sun makes new dawns,
It's my breakfast meal,
With fish smelly appeal,
I chew them as I window watch, doe deer with their fawns.
Wednesday, June 28, 2023
LAKE WOEBE WAS GONE
I went to Lake Woebe and found the lake was gone,
There was not any water, or cabins with green lawn,
There were fish stuck in the mud,
So my trip was not a dud,
The fish were stuck really good; to remove them took brawn.
Sunday, June 25, 2023
THE BIG ALPHA MALE
There was a great fish; a big alpha male,
He ate the other fish, from head to tail,
His body got stronger,
Wider and longer,
He choked to death trying to swallow a snail.
Sunday, May 7, 2023
UNDER THE BOOM, BOOM; PEANUT PIE FOR BREAKFAST
Lightning booming, booming in the dark cloudy, morning sky,
It hits so close, me thinks I will be going bye, bye, bye,
What a way to die,
Like a burnt French fry,
Hope I don't burn to death, before I eat my peanut pie.
Sunday, April 30, 2023
HANK GOES FISHING (MISSING)
Hank went fishing in his boat with a hook, line, sinker and bobbin,
Fish were biting, but off his hook the worms they were robbin,
Then along came this toothy fish,
A thousand pounds of good nutrish,
Never found Hank, and that left the townies, all sobbin.
Friday, February 17, 2023
DINNER 2+ AND MOO
It might be enough for you,
But I like to eat dinner, two,
And most time I eat three,
The fourth, in front of TV,
Then I nightcap with warm milk from a moo.
Wednesday, February 8, 2023
BIRD FEEDER
My little bird gives his feathers tugs,
So he can get a meal of bugs,
He's so shy,
He won't fly high,
Instead he hunts more bugs in my rugs.
Wednesday, December 28, 2022
THE SOUP DECEIT
I limped down the street with my work tired feet,👣
I was looking for a booth with hot soup to eat,🍜
I entered one and got soup,🍵
Like a cold ice cream scoop,🍦
It pained me with brain freeze, and I resent the deceit. 🤕😡😠
Thursday, November 24, 2022
THE REMAINS OF THE DAY (THANKSGIVING)
I had to remove all the remains,
My family ate turkey, the meat and the veins
But, when it came to eating bones,
The bones might as well been hard stones,
They chose pie a la mode and weight gains.
Friday, November 11, 2022
IN MY TURKEY DINNER DREAM
In my turkey dinner dream,
There was never sour cream,
Like ships in the navy,
Taters floated in gravy,
I will resist your cream scheme.
Monday, November 7, 2022
GINGER, GINGER, GINGER IS THE STUFF
I wear ginger on my head,
I like ginger in my bread,
And whatever the fame,
Ginger is a good name,
If eat a little you'll feel well fed.
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