TEACHER WAS RIGHT, WHO KNEW?

Today, I went to a doctor, and he insisted I was brain dead,

He was a specialist, so I had to agree, with all that he said, 

My brain is dead and cold,

Covered with slimy mold,

This was such an unsettling, strange, day, ; I went home and went to bed.

WHAT MY ZOMBIES WILL EAT

I kept a couple of zombies in my basement, for fun,

I fed them orange Jello, and pickled pigs feet on a bun,

They ate my wife, a librarian,

Then became brat, vegetarian,

Without pigs feet; it's orange Jello on a bun and I'm done.

I POEMED THE ZOMBIES

In the streets the zombies roamed, 

Their mouths were drooling while nostrils foamed,

But, I valued my hide,

So, I stayed inside,

And, the zombie saga I poemed.

MY KITH AND KIN FINALLY GOT SOME BRAINS BETWEEN 'EM

I was attacked by zombies, and they were my kith and kin,

They opened my head, ate my brains like sardines in a tin,

Fed kids who were poor,

The old ones who snore,

All were satisfied by me, as I fed them their din, din.

ZOMBIE EATS

Some zombies eat brains, ears, noses and guts,

I know a zombie that eats only pistachio nuts,

He eats in the stores,

Spills most on the floors,

He just eats what he wants, I only eat  pork butts.

ZOMBIE TREAT

There were nothing but zombies left on my street,
They were all looking for someone with big brains to eat,
But, because I don't dig they're groove,
I guess I'll just move,
And, not end up some zombie's lunch treat.

AT THE END OF THE WORLD

At the end of the world I moved into a box,

I ran out of beer so, I was forced to detox,

Detox made me ache and cry,

So, when a zombie came by,

I let it bite me to numb me with pox.

MY LIFE INSURANCE SALESMAN

A zombie came up to my door,
And, sold me life insurance until I was poor,
He put me in my place,
As he chewed on his own face,
So, I got a second job so I could buy more.

My life insurance policy really paid,
To my wife and her boyfriend's accolade,
Now, my life insurance agent, the zombie,
Works for some company named Crombie,
And, his bite got me into the zombie parade.

MY LIFE INSURANCE SALESMAN

A zombie came up to my door,
And, sold me life insurance until I was poor,
He put me in my place,
As he chewed on his own face,
So, I got a second job so I could buy more.

My life insurance policy really paid,
To my wife and her boyfriend's accolade,
Now, my life insurance agent, the zombie,
Works for some company named Crombie,
And, his bite got me into the zombie parade.