I FEEL SAD, FOR ALMOST EVERY BAD THING I'VE DONE

I never walk out into the bright light of the great sun,

I feel the light will expose all the awful things I've done,

I once stole a cookie from mom's jar,

Soaped the windows on dad's car,

I short sheeted big brother's bed, though that was kinda fun.

SAD MISTRESS MAGGIE: HER BOYFRIEND GOT BAGED

My poor, old dog, her name is Mistress Maggie,  

Her crying eyes, her listless ears, are saggy,7

It is my belief,

She's consumed with grief,

Since her boyfriend died; his head, caught in a baggy.

NEVER USE YOUR HANDS TO LAUNCH ROCKETS,: A PARABLE OF SORTS

I use to have fingers, until one 4th Of July,🖖

From my fists I'd launch rockets, then watched them blowup and die,🌋

I got celebration crazy,🍺💃

Then my fingers got lazy,🙌🚑

It's been over 80 years, still I cry.😭

WARNING: BE CAREFUL WHEN HANDLING FIRE AND EXPLOSIVES!!! BEST NOT TO DO IT AT ALL 👍

FISHING AND DYING YOUNG

It was early winter and I felt bold,

On cold water fishing I'd been sold,

Even though, it would be my death, my friends foretold,

I'd for sure be a stat of ones not dying old,

Of course, I didn't harvest fish but I caught a bad cold.