IRREGARDLESS, I SAY

For Bill, "irregardless" is his favorite word,

But amongst PhD scholars it's a word never heard,

Now Bill gets a thrill,

Telling the smart ones to chill,

Saying, " irregardless is the newspeak of the nerd."

THE AMPERSAND LIMERICK

Teacher told me I couldn't use the ampersand (& ),

He said in his class, that symbol was banned,

Well it just is not fair,

Just because teach lost his hair,

That the poor little ampersand is canned.

I PLAGIARIZED MY TERM PAPER AND GOT AN F

I got a F on my term paper, because I plagiarized,
I copied from a book so, I'm not surprised,
I did not use quotes,
Let alone those tedious footnotes,
I guess that's why term papers are so despised.

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