HILL FIRE AND THE PILGRIMS

I'm a big, old fire-breathing dragon, who lives up on the hill,

I scare those pesky pilgrims, who sneak up upon me, for their thrill,

I breath fire upon their britches,

They go screaming for full ditches,

Pilgrims are just darn lucky, I don't barbeque them, like a grill.

AI REPLACED ME

I went to answer the front door, and it was AI,

It claimed my job and my home, and told me "bye, bye",

It claimed my spouse and my kids,

On my dog, it took bids,

I now eat tadpoles from a ditch, while thinking peach pie.