3 WISHES: COLA, BEEF AND A PORCELAIN VACATION

Jim wished that he could consume some beef

Beef and cola, for his hunger grief,

Holy Mola, 

Beef and cola,

And constipation pills for relief.

THE VAMPIRE WHO WANTED TO BE REGULAR

I once knew a vampire, who mixed his blood with prune juice,

He said that he did it, to keep his bowels loose,

He said in year 607,

He got tossed out of heaven,

And permanently injured his caboose.