THE MAGIC FROG AND I

I was looking for some big frogs, to cut off their frog hind legs,

Those appendages taste delicious, when fried with scrambled, bird eggs,

I went down to the local town, frog pond,

Came upon a frog with a magic wand,

He turned me into a big fat fly; what for? The question begs.

FOOD TASTES CHANGE, EXCEPT FOR CHICKEN NUGGETS

I dreamed of ancient Egyptian symbols, dancing across my brain, 

They transported me back in time to an Egyptian pharaoh's rein,

He asked if I brought some chicken nugs,

I said no, so we chowed down on bugs,

Then I went back to my own time, and suffered indigestion pain.

I GOT SPELLED 3Xs

There were three witches sitting up in an ancient, willow tree,

They were hocus pocus, casting evil spells down upon me,

The first, made me a mad dog,

The second, made me a frog,

The third witch made me a pirate, and I could only half see.

THE VAMPIRE WHO WANTED TO BE REGULAR

I once knew a vampire, who mixed his blood with prune juice,

He said that he did it, to keep his bowels loose,

He said in year 607,

He got tossed out of heaven,

And permanently injured his caboose.