MY ONLINE LIFE WAS OVER

I went to social media, and found that I'd been blocked,

It was very upsetting, and I was verily shocked,

I browsed around seeking revenge,

By the gods of old Stonehenge,

But everywhere I went, I was already blocked, ergo mocked.

LEON THE TOAD GOT EVEN

Leon the toad, got bit by a big tick,

That made Leon the toad, incredibly sick,

The internet thought funny,

When Leon became runny,

So, Leon bought the internet, and made it die quick.

BETWEEN BACON AND SOCIAL MEDIA, I CHOSE BACON EVERYTIME

I went to Twitter and I couldn't twit a tweet,

I felt really low, I felt deep defeat,

I did not get bitter,

Because they signed me off Twitter,

I can spend the time frying bacon to eat.

THE GLITTER QUITTER CRITTER

Got me some eye makeup and glitter,

To make a new selfie for Twitter,

Made many fans bitter,

They called me a dimwiter,

I canceled my account, because I'm also a quitter.

MY TWEET, TWEET WAR

I got told off, and it was bitter,

By a bot troll, trolling Twitter,

They said I was a stupid quitter,

Said I should shut up, or I'd getter,

I addressed the bot, called them, Dim Witter. 

HORSEY DORSEY ON TWITTER

Horsey Dorsey had four feet,

Horsey Dorsey liked to tweet,

When his hooves would quickly pound,

He made a galloping hoof sound,

Unless he had music, then he'd pound to the beat.

SOCIAL MEDIA, I'M NOT ALL THERE

I have been banned from all social media on earth,

All my comments are deleted, from my death back until my birth,

I guess I'll have a munch,

Mostly candy bars for lunch,

I can't gain social media followers, but I increase my girth.

BREAKFAST POST ROAST URINE

I went to do an internet post,

While in thought I burned my toast,

It was my last slice of bread,

That was not stale, moldy dead,

My coffee tastes like a urinal roast.

HOW TO BE A NEWS SHOW STAR

If you want people to hear you sing,

Then, you sing only lyrics that are right of wing,

You'll be a famous star,

Invited to parlor par,

And, your coffers will be filling ding, ding, ding.

THERE WAS A BITTER MAN

There was a man, who was so vehemently bitter,
He attacked all in family over the media called twitter,
He attacked his cousin the monk,
Said his car-dealer uncle sold junk,
He even said his sister was a poor baby sitter.

HOW TO HURT YOUR FAMILY WITH SOCIAL MEDIA LIMERICK

There was a man, who was so vehemently bitter,
He attacked all in family over the media called twitter,
He made fun of  his cousin the monk,
Said his car-dealer uncle sold junk,
He even said his sister was a poor baby sitter.