THE TATTOO

To scare my spouse, pets and kids, when I am feeling the blue,

I went to the barber and bought me a scorpion tattoo,

Its in the middle of my forehead,

And, I gave it a human name, Fred,

I showed the kids, and they started laughing, I cried, boohoo.

MY COUSINS CAME TO.VISIT, FROM CANADA

My Canadian cousins came to visit, and I think they ate my cats,

They are two freckled, 8 year old, red haired girls, and also little brats,

They would have ate my dogs,

But they craved my pollywogs, 

When I visit them in Vancouver, maybe their gerbils will become hats.