A SMOKER FIXES GAS LEAKS: WHAT COULD GO WRONG

My banana nut bread has been abruptly paused,

My cooking stove went out, and it was gas leak caused,

The gas leak fixer fella,

Smoked cigs, his nails were yella,

He lit a cigarette, now he's bandaged and gaused.

THE CINNAMON BUN AND MY STAIN

I served punch in my fanciest bowl,

In the bottom the bowl had a hole,

That's where my punch would drain,

On ma's carpet, it left a big stain,

I took comfort with a cinnamon roll.

I GOT THE ROOF LEAKING FLOOR CAVE IN BLUES

The rainstorm made my roof leak and, it leaked a lot,

The rain filled up every plastic bowl I had and, every cooking pot,

So, the rain then really soaked my floor,

The floor caved in and what's more,

I called my insurance agent and rain coverage I have not.

PARADISE FOR SALE?

My trailer is starting to decompose,

The plumbing is shot so, I hooked the pump to a hose,

The roof leaks streams in the rain,

My caved in floors provide a drain,

I'd sell but, I'd owe money at close.