MY HOME AND MY BOAT: ONE DON'T STAND, ONE DON'T FLOAT

The big rain storm hit so hard that my boat went sinkin',

My house collapsed down the hill, like the logs of Lincoln,

It rained over 10 inches today,

And, with the tidal wave off the bay,

I hope my insurer has a check, that it's inkin'.

MY SPACECRAFT RAN INTO A STAR

My Spacecraft by L. Brandt

My spacecraft ran into a star,
Now, my spacecraft will not go,
And, I did not pay my insurance bill,
So, I cannot get a tow,

I'm now stranded way out in deep space,
My oxygen is running low,
No one answers calls to my place,
And, I can't reach my good friend Joe,

I'd like to order pizza,
But, there's limits on my doe,
Alone and hungry in deep space,
There are no limits on my woe. 

I GOT THE ROOF LEAKING FLOOR CAVE IN BLUES

The rainstorm made my roof leak and, it leaked a lot,

The rain filled up every plastic bowl I had and, every cooking pot,

So, the rain then really soaked my floor,

The floor caved in and what's more,

I called my insurance agent and rain coverage I have not.

INSURANCE QUOTES FOR SQUEAKY DUCK FLOATS

In the canal there was nothing but boats,

All of them yellow like squeaky duck floats,

But, on the day of the storm,

The boats had a submarine norm,

And, were the subjects of insurance quotes.

CLARITY OF MIND

Today I had a "clarity of mind,"
I realized that I was in a real bind,
My taxes were due,
My insurances too,
And, no money could I find.

CLARITY OF MIND

Today I had a "clarity of mind,"
I realized that I was in a real bind,
My taxes were due,
My insurances too,
And, no money could I find.