I WENT TO EGYPT TO DIG UP A MUM

I went to Egypt to dig up a mum,

But, I stayed at a hotel and drank tankards of rum,

So, I let the mum be,

And, watched cable TV,

While chewing on a big wad of gum.

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TOO LATE FOR TEA WITH TUT, OH MY

I had a little time-ship, but the door got stuck tight shut,

I could not get outside to meet the king we know as Tut,

I used my brand new space crowbar,

But when I got the door ajar,

King Tut had been all mummified, along with his dog, Mutt.