"STICKY FINGERS" RODNEY RAN THE TILL

The gross profit results looked extremely odd,

So, I took it to my accountant, named Todd,

He said someone's been stealing,

From the till, they've been peeling,

I knew it was my daughter's boyfriend, named Rod. 

I'M WORKING CHRISTMAS DAY

So my boss can island trip far away,

I have go to work on this Christmas Day,

I have to be like a cop,

And guard the pawn shop,

So no one breaks in, takes stuff, and not pay.