THE WE WALLOP WINKY

I would very often get a wallop, alongside my head,

It's the Winky family language, no words are ever said,

All is quiet as a cold, dead mouse,

In my Grandma Winky's little house,

It is where we're born, and we live, and wallop, until we're dead.

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NIGHT OF THE NEIGHBORS

My neighbors drank some bad whisky, they made in a lead barrel,

It affected their small minds, now they have all gone quite feral,

They're eating each others fleas,

And swinging in the big trees,

I've hidden both my pets, so they won't be in dinner peril. 

MY EARS GOT A BATH IN THE BAY

I once had two large facial organs, some call ears,

I lost them fishing out on the crowded, bay piers,

For an entire day,

Fish hooks flew round my way,

I felt nothing, because I was full of malt beers.

I'M THE BRAIN BLOCKER: IGNORANCE RULES🤘

Ignorance is what I practice, every single day,

Ignorance is my happy place, and that's the place I stay,

For those who are smarty,

I'll ruin your party,

If you push smarty ideas, I'll be there in your way.

A MEANINGLESS, WHIMSICAL PHILOSOPHY

The universe appears eternal, from dawn, to dawn, to dawn, to dawn,

But, when the universe disappears, its life will be a tiny yawn,

So head to mars,

Maybe, the stars,

Eat expensive seafood, like lobster, oysters, crabs, octopus and prawn. 

WOODSTOVE MELTED PLASTIC FAN, AND MY SHACK BURNED.

My fan got hot and caught on fire,

It was atop my woodstove, which caused the dire,

My melted, plastic fan,

Made great flames and I ran,

My shack was nearly all paid off, now I can't retire.

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THE BIG ALPHA MALE

There was a great fish; a big alpha male,

He ate the other fish, from head to tail,

His body got stronger,

Wider and longer,

He choked to death trying to swallow a snail.

RAY GUNS ARE NOT A TOY

Frosty found he had no fun.

By playing with his hot ray gun,

He vaporized his toe,

He set his leg aglow,

All the way up to his bun.

SMARTER THAN THE AVERAGE BEAR

Donny thought he was smarter than the average bear,

He broke into cabins and did not care,

Then, he found a loaded gun

Played with it just for fun,

Now, Donny is no longer here nor there.