RETAIL IS DETAIL; IT HELPS IF YOU ARE BANANAS

I use to clerk in a produce store, and I cut and cleaned the lettuce, good,

Next, I placed the lettuce in the display case, stacked exactly, as it should,

I stacked the apples on a table,

Faced out the variety label,

I stacked bananas, and marked down over ripe ones, for making breads and pud.

I'VE PICKED SO MANY BERRIES, BOOGERS WOULD BE A NICE CHANGE

I went down to the town used  bookstore, but every book was gone,16

In the mail I got a notice, to be at the farm fields at dawn,16

I had to pick berries everyday,

When I did not get done, they made me stay,

I now look forward to winter, because the berries will be gone.

I LOST MY JOB IN AEROSPACE

My boss kicked me hard, down the unemployment path,

Because my employer required I do math,

But not too long out the door,

I got work moping a floor,

On weekends at the zoo, I scrub down the giraffe.

A MARRIAGE, A BUSINESS AND HEAVES

There is a house painter named Steves,

He only paints right under the eaves,

He leaves the rest of the house,

For his unlucky spouse,

Steve then drinks at the bar till he heaves.