MY BEST DATE LIMERICK

I like going to restaurants and dining alone,
That sets up the evening for a positive tone,
I spend half the money,
I think my jokes are all funny,
And don't waste time the next day on the phone.

MARNIE PUT OUT FOR INSPECTION

Marnie put out for close inspection,
Her entire mint stamp collection,
It was a high value estate,
That she would share with a mate,
I decided to give Marnie my full affection.