FLYING MONKEY, HAIR THIEF

Along came a big flying monkey, and he flew off with my toupee,

I'll never see that fake hair again, because the monk flew far away,

My new hairline I fear,

Sits just north of my ear,

Oh, those big, bad, nasty, flying monkeys; may they find much woe, one day.

"THE RENT IS TOO DAMN HIGH"

Phil became a landlord to make money, and it's aces,

He crams a lot of people into little tiny places,

Phil decided, what the heck,

He takes tenants whole paycheck,

Phil smiles, taking checks from those little starving faces.

MY SPECIAL FATHER'S DAY GIFT

I got thumb screws for Father's Day, and I don't have any kids,

I got the screws from my business pal; our biz is on the skids,

To stay afloat we did a crime,

Might go to jail, and do some time,

We spend our days waiting for the cops, at downtown bar, called "Sids".