BEAT BY WALL STREET

Because I invest with a Wall Street bank,
I should not be upset when my savings tank,
Their advice is often really rank,
They trade against me; they’re such a skank,

My broker is drinking imported booze,
While he tells me the really bad news,
He gets out a gun and says “Beat it, you loose,
If you don’t leave now I’ll call the cops if I choose”,

Now while my broker vacations in Rome,
He spends all my money; that little gnome,
I thought I’d retire to a really nice home,
Instead I’ll be buried in a casket of foam.

I WENT TO SELL MY STOCKS ON CHRISTMAS DAY

I went to sell my stocks on Christmas Day,
For I needed to buy presents and no way to pay,
But, Wall Street was closed,
I was totally hosed,
I’d better skip town right away.