I KNOCKED A PIZZA DOWN

I found a whole pizza, but it was up in the trees,

Don't know how it got there, but there was a steady breeze,

It took me quite a bit,

But, I found a long stick,

I caught the sausage pizza, and added cheddar cheese.

GUPPIES FOR THE FAIR OR FOOD

I raised me some beautiful guppies to sell at the farm fair,

People looked into my guppy jug, and saw no guppies there,

It seems someone's sea toad,

Was in guppy lunch mode,

In the next booth sat that toad, with a big smile and dumb stare.

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I SELL MEALS IN KALKASKA

I opened a store to sell people a quick lunch,

I sold cake, sandwiches and ice cold lemon punch,

It was downtown Kalkaska,

Not the one in Nebraska,

I'll Soon be selling coffee and Bismarcks for brunch.

FREDDY HAD VISITORS FROM SPACE

A small space shuttle landed in front of Freddy,

The craft landed behind the old crab apple tree,

Two little green creatures,

Who had no facial features,

Picked the apples, then sampled Fred's hair, blood and pee. 

UNCLE DALE'S TOE NAILS AND BURGERS

I made me a burger but it was a food fail,

When I bit into the meat I found a toenail, 

Couldn't tell from which creature,

Came the unsightly bod feature,

But nearby were nail clippers, belonging to Dale.

VONNY FISH WITH BONNETS ON PUMPERNICKEL BREAD

I caught buckets full of Vonny fish, with bonnets on their heads, 

They taste great on a sandwich, made with pumpernickel breads,

Then with cheese and tartar sauce,

I teach the fish, who's boss,

And that's how I earned, my chef fish preparer creds.

BIRD FLU

I eat mostly the legs off chicken,

I eat down to the bones, where I find slim pickin,

I drink applesauce,

Till I'm sick and toss,

Bird and fruit cause my belly to sicken.

CHICKPEA CHICKEN OF THE SEA SALTS

I got me an old hen, but I ain't got no corn,

So my Cornish hen, I cannot fully adorn,

I got some chickpeas,

And some salt from the seas,

For my chickpea hen, I'll start the oven mid-morn.

LITTLE THREE BEANS EATS, THEN PLAYS HULA HOOPS

Little Three Beans loved his salty, sippy soups,

He use to love salads, but they gave him poops,

Three Beans never eats meats,

Because they smell like feets,

Three Beans eats carbs, before he plays hula hoops. 

PUS ON MY BAGEL, NO THANKS

My bagel had no cream cheese, so I put up a fuss,

The diner said they had no cream cheese, because it turned to pus,

I felt a shame,

Putting the diner to blame,

Then I went back driving, the town local passenger bus. 

THE THRILL OF THE GRILL

I fired up my old rusty gas grill,

Thought for the holiday I'd cook up a thrill,

I cooked burgers and wieners,

For my juveniles and seniors,

And my grilling made everyone ill. 

POOR PUTTY CAT

I spread some tuna on a stick,

But it fell off before I could lick,

The fish drips hit the ground,

And without making a sound,

The cat ate it and then he got sick.

HOTDOG COOKOUT

My cookout hotdogs are looking quite mean,

They have spots that are brown and growths that are green,

But, the guests for the lunch,

I will pickle with punch,

Then, condiments will hide the crime scene.

The spoiled hotdogs I served have made guests really boom,

I wish I'd installed that second bathroom,

And, because of a close Redi Med,

There's just 8 dizzy, 3 dead,

I think the dizzy ones ate some local mushroom. 

THE FAVORITE FOOD OF DRAGONS

The favorite food of dragons,

Is takeout food that is real dear,

For the food comes from a magic kingdom,

The food is called a mouseketeer.

POTATOISM

There are potatoes in my stew, chilli and all my  soup,

There are potatoes in my fridge, freezer, cupboards, closet, stoop,

There are potatoes in my jelly,

Deep fat fried ones in my belly,

I got rid of my chickens and store potatoes in their coup.