David was a young man of dread,
He was always unhappy in his head,
He looked down and not up,
Like some sad little pup,
While blue skies hid dark clouds in their stead.
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Saturday, November 21, 2015
DAVID THE YOUNG MAN OF DREAD
Wednesday, November 18, 2015
CELL PHONE HAIKU
Cell phone, static noise,
Sister's birthday, call dropped twice,
Communication?
Sister's birthday, call dropped twice,
Communication?
Friday, November 13, 2015
I WONDER WHERE MY TOOLS ALL WENT
I wonder where my tools all went,
Did the neighbor bring back the ones I lent?
Did someone find my tools had quite an appeal,
And, take the time to just out-and-out steal?
Was it my cousin or brother?
Or, maybe grandmother?
If I didn't need tools it wouldn't be such a big deal.
Labels:
HUMOR,
missing tools,
PARANOIA,
SATIRE,
theft,
theft by neighbors,
theft from family members
Thursday, November 12, 2015
A LITTLE LIE TO MY GIRLFRIEND ABOUT MY HOME
I'm afraid I told my girlfriend a little fib,
When I bragged about my fabulous crib,
She was taken aback,
With my tar papered shack,
And, jabbed her elbow right into my rib.
When I bragged about my fabulous crib,
She was taken aback,
With my tar papered shack,
And, jabbed her elbow right into my rib.
Labels:
ANIMAL HUMOR,
ANIMAL SATIRE,
CRIB LIMERICK,
GIRLFRIENDS,
LIES,
MY CRIB,
TAR PAPERED SHACKS,
VIOLENT GIRLFRIENDS
Wednesday, November 11, 2015
THE HEALTH CARE FRAUD LIMERICK
Jim's doctor does claims for fraudulent health care,
The doctor makes loads of money and Jim is aware,
For Jim fakes a heart attack,
And gets a hefty kickback,
You see there's lots of government money to share.
The doctor makes loads of money and Jim is aware,
For Jim fakes a heart attack,
And gets a hefty kickback,
You see there's lots of government money to share.
Tuesday, November 10, 2015
THE UNSEEN DEER LIMERICK
There was a deer that was completely unseen,
He was hiding in branches real thick and real green,
To the hunters despair,
They saw no deer there,
At deer camp the hunters drank and went mean.
He was hiding in branches real thick and real green,
To the hunters despair,
They saw no deer there,
At deer camp the hunters drank and went mean.
Labels:
DEE SEASON,
DEER CAMP,
DEER HUNTING,
HIDDEN DEER
Monday, November 9, 2015
THE FISH IN MY YARD LIMERICK
I had a fish in my yard,
He went and ate my swiss chard,
He was such a savage,
He ate all of my cabbage,
He brags about it everywhere like a bard.
He went and ate my swiss chard,
He was such a savage,
He ate all of my cabbage,
He brags about it everywhere like a bard.
Labels:
ANIMAL HUMOR,
cabbage swiss chard,
FISH,
garden,
LIMERICK,
SATIRE
Friday, November 6, 2015
MY TURKEY MABEL WON'T BE SERVED ON MY TABLE
My turkey Mabel looked really nice,
Prancing around and pecking lice,
So, my turkey Mabel,
Won't be served on my table,
The restaurant paid a great price.
|
Labels:
HUMOR,
LIMERICK,
pecking lice,
restaurants,
TURKEY
Wednesday, November 4, 2015
THE DASHSHUND DAN LIMERICK
Poor Dachshund Dan,
He wanted to walk like a man,
But, when he walked on two legs,
It was like he was moving stiff pegs,
And, he was stumbling around when he ran.
He wanted to walk like a man,
But, when he walked on two legs,
It was like he was moving stiff pegs,
And, he was stumbling around when he ran.
Labels:
DACHSHUND,
HUMOR,
LIMERICK,
MORAL STORY,
WALKING
Tuesday, November 3, 2015
MY CHICKENS ARE MOVING REAL SLOW
My chickens are moving so slow,
They blame the cold and the snow,
But, if the cold they can't beat,
I guess they're ready to eat,
Tomorrow I'll let them all know.
They blame the cold and the snow,
But, if the cold they can't beat,
I guess they're ready to eat,
Tomorrow I'll let them all know.
Labels:
CHICKENS,
COLD,
cold chickens,
farm humor,
farm limerick,
LIMERICK,
snow
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