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Leigh Collin Brandt

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Thursday, June 26, 2014

THE CORN ROAST LIMERICK

Moose Gillies would brag and would boast,
About his annual summer corn roast,
But, this year he got bent,
When in the fire the corn went,
And, was burnt blacker than his wife's turkey breast roast.  

HOW DO FISH GET WATER OUT OF THEIR EARS

How do fish get water out of their ears,
If I’m a fish that’d be one of my big fears,
Maybe that’s why fish dart to and fro,
And, up and down don’t you know,
 Erratic behavior, until their condition clears.

Wednesday, June 25, 2014

SINISTER SPIDERS ON MY WINDOWSILL

Some sinister spiders sit on my sill,
They think web-weaving is the ultimate thrill,
But, I'll give them some news,
Be careful what choose,
Or, be squished spider-spleen on the grill.  Yum, Yum!


Sunday, June 22, 2014

CHICKEN CAM HAM

There once was a chicken named Cam,
She laid eggs that were all full of ham,
But, the pigs on the farm,
Said ham-eggs did them harm,
So, Cam laid eggs full of blueberry jam.

Saturday, June 21, 2014

THE BAND CALLED PARENT TORMENT

Penny played the clarinet,
Phyllis beat the drum,
Patty tooted her french horn,
Mom and dad drank coke and rum. 

Friday, June 20, 2014

THE PROMISES, PROMISES LIMERICK

"Promises, promises" my fiance would say,
She said that to  me almost every day,
Then, she became most annoyed,
When I chose to avoid,
Making promises I wouldn't keep anyway.


Sunday, June 15, 2014

UNHEALTHY LIVING LIMERICK

Mark ate pigs-feet for his dinner meal,
They were greasy which was the appeal,
Eating lean, like turkey,
Is not that tasty,
Like pigs-feet and corn-feed fat veal.


Wednesday, June 4, 2014

I MADE CORNMEAL BISCUITS LIMERICK

I made some biscuits with cornmeal,
I used half the cornmeal so, what's the deal,
But, my family said "NO!,"
My biscuits had to go,
Thus, my baked goods have little appeal.