LIMERICKS AND STUFF By Leigh Collin Brandt
Blogger ID
Translate
Search This Blog
Showing posts with label
love
.
Show all posts
Showing posts with label
love
.
Show all posts
Wednesday, February 14, 2024
BE MY VALENTINE WARNING
Who wants to be my Valentine on this Monday morning,
I don't have all my marbles, so consider this your warning,
My chocolate little heart,
I will give to you sweet tart,
Then we'll shop for dishware over in the town of Corning.
21422
Saturday, February 3, 2024
MYSTIC MERKEL PREDICTS TRUE
Psychic Mystic Merkel tells the true
About the future of me and you,
Your mom and dad,
They hate me bad,
If we breakup, it'll be a boohoo.ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Wednesday, December 20, 2023
WHY SAM AIN'T GOT NO GIRLFRIEND
There once was a man named Sam,
He ate the putrefied meat from a ham,
It made his bowels all throttle,
So he peed in a bottle,
And farted, on his girlfriend, Pam.
TRUMPET ETUDES BROKE UP THE TWO DUDES
I decided to write etudes, that were fun and fancy,
I did it for the trumpet, for my students Glen and Clancy,
The etudes made them play real good,
Got them out of this neighborhood,
Then they had a falling out, over someone they called Nancy.
Saturday, September 30, 2023
I GOT MY PHONE AND MY FREEDOM, NOW ALL I NEED IS LOVE
It was the first day of October month, and my true love says to me,
"Go out and get a job today, or I am smashing your color tv,"
I did not like the mean tone,
Since, the tv is my phone,
So, now I live roofless on the streets, but from my boyfriend, I am free.
Thursday, August 3, 2023
BARRY HAD AN OCTOPUS
Barry had an octopus, he kept out in his ditch,
Every Sunday the puss would sing, it had near perfect pitch,
The puss sang in church choir,
Only two octaves higher,
The octopus was a pretty thing, and married Rev. Mitch.
Thursday, July 27, 2023
THE BALLAD OF RICHIE AVOID
With Richie, I am quite annoyed,
For where I locate, he will avoid,
He has someone brand new,
So I'm sad, boohoo blue,
When crossing paths, he treats me like a roid.
Sunday, July 2, 2023
DON'T EAT YOUR SWEETIES FEETIES
I once knew this scientist named Pete,
The only thing he studied was feet,
He said what lurked among us,
Was a terminal foot fungus,
And toe jam was not fit to eat
Tuesday, May 2, 2023
ME AND TOAD GOT SNOWED
On the first day of May it snowed,
On the second day it blowed,
I did not care,
I live in despair,
I stayed indoors with my toad.
Monday, March 20, 2023
DAVY: A ROMANCE POEM
Davy has amazing hips,
He acquired, eating chips,
A genetic fluke, gave him fish lips,
His favorite protein is canned kips,
Guzzles beer, water sips.
Saturday, October 1, 2022
TIGHTS ON A PIER
I went to the club and danced under the lights,
My eyes got all red, and everything was all brights,
I met someone dear,
We took a walk on the pier,
We found romance and got tights.
Wednesday, August 10, 2022
CYRUS THE IRIS
In my garden bloomed an iris,
I made friends with it for it had no virus,
Our friendship's heading,
Led to a wedding,
Our firstborn came; we named him cyrus.
Thursday, June 2, 2022
IT WAS BITTER TWEET
It was a very bitter tweet,
That I received for my deceit,
I told grandma, I had soar feet,
So I couldn't stop by, for sup to eat,
My rat sister exposed, I went clubbing for meat.
Wednesday, May 11, 2022
BANGING IN THE WOODS, A HUNTER'S TAIL
Went out to the woods to bang me a beast,
I sat downwind, where he'd smell me the least,
He snuck up tippy toe,
He was near, I didn't know,
Out of me the beast made a feast.
Monday, February 28, 2022
UNDER THE YIM YONG TREE
Under the yim yong tree I and my dear love matted some grass,
That's where we did picnic and drank from a thermos lined with glass,
And the yim yong fruits,
Made a day full of hoots,
And an evening of toots,
Then after our pipes burned off most of the gas,
We got tired and into dreams we did pass.
Wednesday, February 23, 2022
MARRIAGE OF THE NUCLEAR AFTERGLOWS
Nuclear bombs fell on my house,
And everything died, even the mouse,
I had nowhere to go,
I just sat in my glow,
Another glow-in-dark, became my future spouse.
Wednesday, February 16, 2022
I LOST THE TIGHT SQUEEZE ON MY LOVIE
I went outside when the moon was real bright,
But it was cold and I got some frostbite,
Doc said the frostbite, it lingers,
As he cut off my fingers,
Now I can't hold my Lovie real tight.
Wednesday, February 9, 2022
KISSING IN THE SEA
I saw two fishes holding fins in the sea,
They were kissing and took no note of me,
I told them kissing in public was rare,
They asked me to join their pair,
Now the fishes kissing number exactly three.
Monday, August 2, 2021
WHEN DADDY AND MOMMY ARE KISSY KISSING
They were spooning, making out, first basing,
Out in public and, it was disgracing,
It was my mum and dad,
And, they were making me mad,
Their lovy-dove, for my street cred, was defacing.
Tuesday, March 9, 2021
MY SNOWMAN GOT BURNT IN OUR RELATIONSHIP
I know it's kind of a terrible thing,
But, I burnt my snowman on the first day of spring,
Our relationship is over,
Until, November or October,
I did recover our friendship gold bling.
Older Posts
Home
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Subscribe To Limericks and Stuff By Leigh Collin Brandt
Posts
Atom
Posts
All Comments
Atom
All Comments