BRAIN CHIPS AND PRODUCTIVITY

I was admonished for working too slow,

The boss wanted me to go, go, go, go,

It caused me agonizing pain,

When he planted chips in my brain,

To make the boss more doe, doe, doe, doe.

2724

SOMETIMES MOZART HELPS, SOMETIMES MOZART DON'T

Ron sat on the toilet while listening to Mozart,

Ron thought through osmosis, it would make him real smart,

Ron had a chemistry test,

Yet, if Ron did his best,

He'd still end up growing old at an all night gas-mart.

NANA PSYCHOLOGY

My landline,  nanna left off the hook,

My cellphone, my mean nanna had took,

I sat all alone,

With no friends on the phone,

And, decided to read my school book. 

SPEEDY

It was often, almost never said,

That anyone worked as slow as our Fred,

He worked so slow,

Didn't start or go,

But he'd smile, when he drank and got fed.

ROTTEN TEETH AND DOTS: A LIFE ADVENTURE, BY BOB

Bob didn't brush his teeth, and they all got really rotty,

Then a dentist Bob saw, and the dentist got snotty,

Bob then went out to the woods,

Picked what berries he coulds,

He ate all the berries, and his skin got all dotty. 

TERMINATION REPORT

They laid me off for the holiday,

Said they might hire me back come next May,

Why I was fired nobody would say,

Of course, I call in sick every Monday,

Monday mornings are cold, so in bed I stay.

THE KIDS FINALLY LEFT HOME

I am afraid my trailer ain't rolling nowhere,

It got ripped right in half by a huge grisly bear,

The bear ate the kids, 

Methinks that's good-rids,

They were both in their forties, had no job and didn't care.

EARTH DAY, BIRTHDAY AND POPCORN

It weren't even May,

When I had my Earth Day,

It was on my birthday,

So at home I did stay,

Watching movies, I had to pay,

Eating popcorn from a tray,

On the bean bag where I lay.

Kissed a boyfriend, he named Ray,

So I guess, I must be gay,

Ordered salad, I got hay,

Then went swimming in the bay.