ME AND FRED AND THE ALIEN DRONE

I had a drone fly into my bedroom, and hover over my head,

It was definitely from outer space, just like the internets said,

It had many feet with toes,

It was scented like a rose,

Then it pulled out a ray gun, and united me with my dead dog, Fred.

GOOPY AND THE LAW OF DENTAL HYGIENE

There was something goopy, that came up through my straw,

I sucked it from my soda pop, into my jaw,

What a maddening, big waste,

I used a tube of toothpaste,

To brush the goopy away; following dental law.

LIVING IN MICHIGAN IS A BUGGER

I live in Michigan, we have zillions of bugs

They eat into your eyeballs, you share them, with hugs,

Bugs poop on your pans and dishes,

They attack your cute goldfishes,

You'!l even drink a few, in your rootbeer chug-a-lugs. 

EYE HOLE DIGGERS

Some ticks fell down from the heavenly, blue sky,

They fell from the dead willow tree; oh dear, my,

I ran to my hotrod,

But, no use was my bod,

I was blind, because they dug holes in each eye.

52424

APPLES, WORMY OR SQUISHY

The apples on the tree were wormy and ripe,

The apples on the ground were squishy like tripe,

So, wormy apples it be,

That I picked from the tree,

Although, apples with fewer worms are my type.

MOUSE BE NIMBLE, MOUSE BE QUICK, OR IN THE GLUE TRAP YOU WILL STICK

Little Ginger was a furry,

She was a mouse not in a hurry,

She moved slowly, tap tap,

Got stuck in a glue trap,

Then the furry started to worry.

10522

LOTIONS,AND POTIONS AND WORMS IN THE EARS

Jimmy had worms burrowing deep into his ears,

He had worm eggs sliding down his face in his tears,

He bought topical lotions,

And consumable potions,

He got better, and told his saga over beers.

THE CHIPMUNK AND THE NOSE RING

I lost my gold nose ring when it fell on the floor,

Stolen by a chipmunk, because I left open the door,

Chipmunks are such thieves,

They hide booty in my eaves,

I should steal their black walnuts, to even the score.

While Fungal Harvesting, Watch Out For Your Shoes

Whilst I cleaned fungus, from between my toes, at Lou's,

An alien from mars, stole my brand new blue/pink shoes,

That Martian, done a real bad,

I squeezed him hard, he got sad,

Now he's just a puddle of runny Martian ooze. 

ALIEN DINNER DATE

I dated an alien from Omicron Eat,

They had no arms, but had kick-ass feet,

They made me a meal,

Out of Omicron eel,

With rolls made from Omicron wheat.

MY PARASITES RULE DAYS AND NIGHTS

I am full of parasites,

Micro ones and big ones with bites,

They burrow in,

Organs and skin,

Making irritating days, restless nights.